The bear woke up after his long hibernation of the winter. "Boy, am I hungry!" The bear wandered around and ate some berries. "These blackberries are too bitter and unripe for my taste, I'll go eat something else." He stumbled upon a honeybee hive and took some honey out and ate it. He was swarmed and stung by many of those bees. "That wasn't my favorite batch of honey, I'm still pretty hungry, let me go find some other food. He came across a cabin in the woods. "There maybe some food in there." To some, this was known as the Northern Vermont Massacre. It was a tragic happening. The 7 membered family, the Hernandez family, all died that day. The bear chase all of the adult and children and the house and brutally ate them.

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Why couldn't the kitten drink from its water bowl? Its face was stapled to the floor.

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roses are red, violets are blue, f*** you wh*re

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WHAT'S THE DIFFERENCE BETWEEN DANII AND SCAFFHOLDING? ONLY ONE STILL HAS A POLE 1 LIKE = 1 TEAR FOR DANII

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Q: What's white, black, and red all over? A: The yellow brick road

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i just got all five seasons of big bang theory in the mail for xmas... i'm divorcing my wife.

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Why is cheese yellow? Answer: I don't know, I was hoping that you would know.

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A: What did the banana say to the other banana? B: I don't know, what? A: I don't know either, I was hoping you did.

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How do you kill Chuck Norris? Short Answer: You can't.

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What do you call a ostrich with no legs? Damn, that's funny.

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Have you seen the movie "Constipation?" No. It hasn't come out yet! Of course there is no such movie in production and no plans for such a movie exist.

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I like my women how I like my salad. Without a penis.

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Two fish are swimming and hit a cement wall. One fish says Dam.

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Q: How many pandas does it take to screw in a lightbulb? A: I don't know.

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There was a man who entered a local paper's pun contest. He sent in ten different puns. He won.

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A. Knock, Knock B. Come in

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Why do black people eat at KFC? Because KFC serves good food at reasonable prices.

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How do you get four gay guys to sit on a stool? Ask them kindly to do so. Their sexual orientation is of little to no importance in this situation.

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SOPA gets passed and shuts down anti-joke because KFC claims the picture of the anti-joke chicken

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What's funny about using a shake weight? It resembles masturbating with a penis.

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Why did the pony go to the Doctor's? It had Horse AIDS.

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Why did the chicken sneeze? Because someone put pepper on its nose.

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your mom died.

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How could the teacher tell that the student was dead? logic

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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