Whats the difference between a pizza and a Jew? Jews are people

What's the difference between peanut butter and jelly ? Among many things, one is made with peanut butter, the other with fruits.

A man walks into a bar. After several hours of drinking and loud unintellegable outbursts to those around him, the man wonders off to a nearby bus stop and relieves himself. He is now a registered sex offender.

boy: you want to hear something funny? girl: what? boy: women's rights girl: you want to hear something trivial? boy: what? girl: your penis

Whats something really annoying? A guy who presses enter too much. hehe

Why did the chicken cross the road? I don't know.

Knock Knock Who's there? The police. The police who? Sir, your wife has been killed. Please open the door so that we may discuss this matter. The man then opens the door and listens to the tale of how a disgruntled worker opened fire in a grocery store, killing 13 people including his wife. Unable to cope with this and the fact both his parents passed away earlier that year he later hangs himself soon after the police leave.

Why is pi? Because circles.

Why where the 3 little children talking about muffins? Because muffins are smart.

You are so ugly that plastic surgery may be an option for you to consider.

A cow walks into the butcher shop, he looks around then mourns the loss of his brothers

How did my grand parents go about surviving the holocaust? Well, for starters, they weren't Jewish, they never lived in Germany, and to be honest, my grandparents probably would have supported the Nazi's because they are right wing pricks

What is the last digit of Pi? Pi is an infinite decimal sequence, and therefore has no last number, but if it did, it would presumably be somewhere from 0-9.

what did johnny's mom do for his 50th birthday? she died

Whats worse than a pile of dead baby's? Being raped by a giant scorpion. Well that escalated quickly. Also i'm gonna call the cops.

Q: What's blue and fuzzy A: Blue fuzz

your momma's so fat i almost didn't have sex with her.... almost.

So a blonde woman gets into her car. She then drives to the grocery store because she is hungry and wants to buy food to make her dinner.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I hate black people, and mexicans too.

I had a great joke to tell you. I didn't want people stealing my ideas so I didn't write it. Haha

How many elephants can you fit in a car? depends how big the car is!

Why did the black guy get kicked out of school? Because he was poor academically.

Knock Knock Who's there? the mailman.

Why was the man full? He ate a meal.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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