So theres a priest, a rabbi, and an athiest on a cliff. They all remark at the beautiful view and take plenty of pictures with their respected families.

How does a black guy who murdered his wife get out of jail? He serves his sentence and is allowed to return back home.

What do you call a black guy in college? A student.

Augustus was touring his Empire and noticed a man in the crowd who bore a striking resemblance to himself. Intrigued, he asked: ‘Was your mother at one time in service at the Palace?’ ‘No, your Highness,’ he replied, ‘but my father was.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he happened to be walking in that general direction.

What did the headless man say? Nothing. The man can't speak because he doesn't have a head.

It was a stormy night and a stinking boy was running away from the co-op, he was clutching onto his pocket and constantly looked over his shoulder.... panting the boy reaches for a rusty door handle he opens the door quickly and shuts it behind him. "mam i got tea" said the boy "thanks david we will eat tonight for once" said a big chinned pharaoh.

A man walks into a bar and asks "Where is your bathroom?" He is directed towards the restroom, where he then covers himself in toilet paper and calls himself a moose.

Three men sit at a bar. A clown walks in, so the first man says, "Oh, what fresh hell is this?", gets up and leaves. Then a fairy flies in, so the second man says, "Aw, hell no!", gets up and leaves. So the third man was alone with the fairy and clown.

Why did sally fall off the swing? She had no arms

Why did the man mow his lawn without his shirt on? Because it was very hot out.

What do you call an arab with a shemagh on his head and a gun A man who is concerned for his wellbeing and family

What is the difference between a pumpkin and a dead baby? There are thousands of differences between a dead human and the fruit of a pumpkin plant. One of them is that I didn't choke my wife to death with a pumpkin. Another is that pumpkins have a stem.

Why do vampires suck the blood of their victims? Because blood is very nutritious and provides more iron for heamoglobin.

Why did the one-legged chicken say déjà vu? It felt a strong sensation that the current event had been experienced in the past.

Why did Suzy's neck hurt? Because it was broken

What never seems to get old? AIDS.

Whats funny about a car crash? If a bowl of soup is talking.

- I shot the sheriff! - You murderer

Why did the boy dress up as a zombie? Because it was Halloween.

Two sausages were in a pan. One says "Wow it's hot in here!" the other says "OH MY GOD A TALKING SAUSAGE"

Q: What's funny about prostitution? A: Nothing. It's a widely misunderstood profession.

What do you call a black man from Germany? A Germ.

why dont black people like cruise ships? they already fell for that trick 400 years ago

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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