Have you heard about the new German microwave? It's a great labour-saving appliance that cooks food much more quickly than a conventional oven

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what do you call a cow? A cow

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Fags are gay.

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Test

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A lamp of light That shines so bright Except when it is night A glow up high You wonder why It moves across the sky. What am I? A blogger who posts jokes on AntiJoke.com.

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Miss Polly had a Dolly who was sick sick sick So she called for the Doctor to come quick quick quick The doctor came with his bag and his hat And he knocked on the door with a rat-tat-tat. He looked at Polly's Dolly and he shook his head. He said she had leprosy and must have all her limbs amputated.

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It’s dead.

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Dislike if you shag sheep ;)

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What do you do when a elephant is sitting on your fence? You hit it with a fridge

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Why did he buy ANTIJOKE THE BOOK! - ? Because he wanted to read it.

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Why didn't Joe have any friends? Because according to Thomas Hobbes man is anti-social by nature and therefore the only friends that he has are purely to reach his own ends and thus Joe cannot truly have friends in the sense that many use the word.

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I was in the middle of downloading a porno of two hot girls getting it on, my computer got a virus and crashed.

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What did Batman say to Robin before they got into the car? Robin get in the car.

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What did Batman say to his parents? Nothing. They're dead. Idiot.

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Justin Littleton's mom accidentally texting him about buying weed, and then offering to buy him ice cream to make up for it.

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What's the easiest way to burn calories? Set a fat kid on fire.

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What's green and fuzzy and would hurt a lot if it fell out of a tree and hit you? A pool table

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Knock-Knock who's there? Artichoke Artichoke who? Your friend Artie choked on a ham sandwich, and I'm sorry to inform you that he didn't survive.

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What's better than winning a gold medal in the Special Olympics? Not being disabled.

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What does 1+1 equal? 2

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What does a turtle do on its back? NOTHING!

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What do you call an arab with a shemagh on his head and a gun A man who is concerned for his wellbeing and family

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I enjoy the fact that the jokes I post that do not make me laugh, are the ones that get zero thumbs, while those that at least make me smile, get at least a couple, I admit thought that its hard to keep track with me, I type jokes so fast that they disappear in the back before people can thumb them... Have you heard... Of the dog that was barking up the wrong three? The three said: Damn dog! I am not a tree! The dog kept barking, as dogs do not speak. Moral: Numbers speak fluently in most languages though...

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When there's something weird in your neighborhood, who you gonna call? The police.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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