Have you heard about the new German microwave? It's a great labour-saving appliance that cooks food much more quickly than a conventional oven

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Test

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What do you get when you sunflower? Vegan turtles.

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Q. What language cant you speak A.Sign language

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What do you call a blonde on the Moon? That depends on what her name is.

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Why cant the white man dunk? Because he lost his legs in a horrible car accident

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Why do vampires suck the blood of their victims? Because blood is very nutritious and provides more iron for heamoglobin.

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HEY EVERYONE THUMBS UP!

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What is the difference between a joke, and an antijoke? A joke is actually funny.

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What did the headless man say? Nothing. The man can't speak because he doesn't have a head.

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It was a stormy night and a stinking boy was running away from the co-op, he was clutching onto his pocket and constantly looked over his shoulder.... panting the boy reaches for a rusty door handle he opens the door quickly and shuts it behind him. "mam i got tea" said the boy "thanks david we will eat tonight for once" said a big chinned pharaoh.

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Did you know Helen Keller had a dog? Yeah neither did she.

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A man calls his 23 year old nephew on a Saturday night. He's calling him, in order to apologise for molesting him when he was younger. As he could no longer live with the guilt and shame. They both start to cry on the phone. The nephew hangs up " I can't do this.." The man receives an email from his boss, saying " Lisa told me she's still waiting for your analysis on the new federal cuts and how they're going to affect us. Please send them asap."

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Knock-Knock who's there? Artichoke Artichoke who? Your friend Artie choked on a ham sandwich, and I'm sorry to inform you that he didn't survive.

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Who lives in a pineapple under the sea? Nobody, because first, pineapples are too small to fit in, and second, you would drown.

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Why did the boy dress up as a zombie? Because it was Halloween.

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Roberto: Did you watch that WNBA game tonight?!? Will: No Roberto: Me either

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Izzy and Zayn Malick got married. Then Zayn asked for a divorce due to their age difference..

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A horse walks into a bar, it gets a concussion. -mattobrado

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Q: What's funny about prostitution? A: Nothing. It's a widely misunderstood profession.

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what do you do when a baby screams? shake it.

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roses are red violets are blue your baby has down syndrome

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I am darkness, soon I shall rule the world, those of you that desire to serve me thumb this up, those of you that desire eternal fear beyond your imagination, thumb me down. Moral: Try thinking of me and thinking "he is crazy", in order to unlock the secrets behind spontaneous human combustion.

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What's the difference between mustangs and dead babies I don't collect mustangs

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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