a black man and a squirrel get hit on two different roads what's the difference? well for starters theyre two different species. a squirrel is much smaller than a human and has his own mark on society. the man will be missed dearly by his family and if the impact with the car wasnt bad, he may have a chance to make it out alive at the hospital. the squirrel however is not so lucky. it will be left to die on the street or would have died on impact already with sadly no squirrel hospital to tend to it.

Q: What do you call a black pilot? A: A pilot, you racist

A young girl falls off a swing, she is paralysed from the neck down and unable to walk every agian.

What's worse than listening to Justin Beiber? Getting hit by a train.

Q. What did Grandmother get Little Boy Johnny for Christmas? A. Nothing. She died on Thanksgiving Day.

How do you confuse a blonde? You ask her a question.

How did Helen Keller's parents punish her? They sent her to her room without dinner.

I love you, you live me. Now get the FUDGE out of the tree!!!

What's the difference between a pizza and a black man A pizza can feed a family of four

what would you do if Michael Jackson was drowning? he can't drown he's already dead

What is the difference between a joke, and an antijoke? A joke is actually funny.

Magic is another word for "poorly perceived analysis of the mechanics of this complex instrumentality we call optical illusion."

What did the blind kid get for Christmas? A collection of braile children's reading books.

Why didn't the boy get any presents for christmas? There is no Santa Claus.

A man calls his 23 year old nephew on a Saturday night. He's calling him, in order to apologise for molesting him when he was younger. As he could no longer live with the guilt and shame. They both start to cry on the phone. The nephew hangs up " I can't do this.." The man receives an email from his boss, saying " Lisa told me she's still waiting for your analysis on the new federal cuts and how they're going to affect us. Please send them asap."

Q: What's Lindsay Lohan getting for Christmas? A: AIDS

Why Does God Hate Gays? He Doesent, God Does Not Exist.

What did the cat say to another ? meow

LeBron James hits a game winning three with time running out in the Finals.

Like CHUCK NORRIS, CHUCK NORRIS like You !

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How does a black guy who murdered his wife get out of jail? He serves his sentence and is allowed to return back home.

Knock Knock Whos there? The police, we've been getting reports of many ironically named metaphors knocking on your door to which you reply witty utterances, can you explain this frankly quite disturbing behaviour? The police, we've been getting reports of many ironically named metaphors knocking on your door to which you reply witty utterances, can you explain this frankly quite disturbing behaviour who? Wait aren't you the one who's supposed to supposed tell the punchline? Oh Yeah

What does the Cookie Monster eat? Nothing. The Cookie Monster is not a living, sentient being and does not require sustenance to live.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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