Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't. The chicken got crushed by a fridge.

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Wanna hear a joke? Womens' rights

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Why did the man mow his lawn without his shirt on? Because it was very hot out.

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How do you make a plumber stop sagging? Tickle his crack

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It was a stormy night and a stinking boy was running away from the co-op, he was clutching onto his pocket and constantly looked over his shoulder.... panting the boy reaches for a rusty door handle he opens the door quickly and shuts it behind him. "mam i got tea" said the boy "thanks david we will eat tonight for once" said a big chinned pharaoh.

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Q:What's red and fluffy? A: A blue rock, if blue were red and rocks were fluffy

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What's the easiest way to burn calories? Set a fat kid on fire.

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Test

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How do you make a baby spin? Put it in a blender and turn it on.

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What's the difference between a black man and a large pizza One is an ethnicity derived from Africa and One is an Italian dish that is well'ly known in all four corners of the world.

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What did the nurse say to the man who got an erection while being given a sponge bath? She assured him it was a normal reaction and moved on to clean his arms.

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Knock-Knock. Who's there? The person knocking at your door.

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What did the doctor say to the terminally ill patient? Your going to die.

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What is the difference between a pumpkin and a dead baby? There are thousands of differences between a dead human and the fruit of a pumpkin plant. One of them is that I didn't choke my wife to death with a pumpkin. Another is that pumpkins have a stem.

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Dislike if you shag sheep ;)

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What does the Cookie Monster eat? Nothing. The Cookie Monster is not a living, sentient being and does not require sustenance to live.

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Yo mama is so hairy, because she's arab.

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What did Batman say to Robin before they got into the car? Robin get in the car.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he happened to be walking in that general direction.

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Roses are red Violets are blue But this is Italy So let me fuck you

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Why did the black man get the grape soda? It was the only soda left.

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Yo mamma's so fat, she should try NutriSystem.

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An englishman, irish-man and a scotsman walk into a bar. Englishman orderds a pint of becks, Irishman a guiness and the Scot a whiskey. Everything is absolutely fine and nothing of even remote interest happens.

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Knock knock ... KNOCK KNOCK ... I guess nobody's home.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops