Why did my brother drive the speed limit? Because it's the law

Whats so funny? Josh nash's face

Knock, knock. *answers door*

Captain Falcon is eating a restaurant. After he sits down at his table, a waiter comes by to take his drink order. Not wanting to skew his blood alcohol level for his next race, he asks for a non-alcoholic drink. The waiter says, "We only have water and punch. Which would you like?" Captain Falcon replies, "Water, please."

What did the farmer say when he lost his cow? Where's my wife?

A drunk walks out of a bar gets in his car and proceeds to drive home the driver passed out at the wheel swerved in the wrong lane and smashed the car of the Jefferson family a young family of 4, the Jefferson family's car exploded into flames while the drunk sat back laughed and rubbed the wound on his head

Hi. Hello. I live in Iowa. Same. Im your neighbor. Same. I like corn. Same. Im gay. Same. HAHAHAHAHAHA gotcha! No i really am gay and the fact that you thought that was funny saddens me deeply.

What do you call a handyman with no arms? By his name.

Knock Knock -Who's there I eat mipe -I eat mipewho hahahah -Oh I'm gonna beat your ass

Why was Six afraid of Seven. Seven was in a horrible car accident recently and became very disfigured. He didn't tell Six, so the initial shock of seeing him for the first time was quite jarring for Six. Seven has had multiple surgeries since and, once the swelling recedes, he should look much better. It will still hurt for him to chew though.

Spell: “This word”

Knock Knock Who's there? The police. Come out with your hands up.

What starts with P and ends in ORN? Porn.

What did the Ginger get for Christmas? A: a soul

Two blondes were driving down the road. The blonde driving looks at her friend in the passenger seat and asks her to see if her blinker is working. So the blonde looks out the window and says, ''Yes. No. Yes. No.''

How do you confuse a gay person? How? 7

that awkward moment when there is no candy in the van.....

10 people walk into a bar. 6 hours later, 3 more people walk into the bar. There are now 12 people in the bar, and one corpse in the dumpster out back.

So there are three black people on a plane. The pilot comes over the intercom and says "Wow wow wow wait a second... ...why are there only three people on this plane? This is a commercial flight"

How many blondes does it take to change a lightbulb? One. This task does not require over 1 person to complete.

The Christian prayed every night to God for a new bike. He kept it up for a year. Finally, he got a bike for his birthday.

The only time your mother was ever considered "hot" was at her cremation.

How many 1 ft dwarfs does it take to climb up a 55 ft ladder? Only one. It's just a ladder. All you gotta do is climb up it.

Three guys went barhopping. One slipped and broke his dick.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...