Two men walk into a bar. You would have thought one of them would have seen it.

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What do an elephant and grapes have in common? They both have a trunk...except for the grapes

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Knock Knock Who's there? Your landlord. Get the hell out.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I forgot to go to the bathroom

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A dyslexic man walks into a bra. He is embarrassed but realises it has nothing to do with his dyslexia.

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Your mumma is so stupid her IQ is 40.

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How do you stop a bus You throw a fridge at it

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What do you call shark with no dorsal fin? Unused ingredients for soup.

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What do you call a black man who flies a plane? A Pilot

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Why was Steve hungry? Because the last time he ate was yesterday.

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There was a man who entered a local paper's pun contest. He sent in ten different puns. He won.

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Knock knock Who's there This is the police, open the door. I don't know anybody by that name

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Why did Max drink the red Gatorade? Because he likes it more than all of the other flavors.

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What's red ad looks like a green bucket? A red bucket to a color blind person

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A African American male and a Mexican male are both in a car, who is driving? Most likely the owner or the car.

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WHat did Helen Keller get for Christmas? an ipod

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Why did the little kid color outside the lines? He had Parkinson's Disease.

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What's funny about using a shake weight? It resembles masturbating with a penis.

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SOPA gets passed and shuts down anti-joke because KFC claims the picture of the anti-joke chicken

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why did the clown fall off the swing because he got shot in the face

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Why was the boy not feeling well? He swallowed a piano.

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My thanks to those that thumb down my comment below, you have the possibilty to become one of my over 100.000.000 members, as long as you follow your heart, your own will, we got you covered. We got over 600.000 never members since last year, you are far from alone, thumb this comment up, leave a small comment, and I shall send one of my shadows to tell you more, or online if you prefer that, but then I would need your email address... ...As for your home address? Nah, already know it just let me know if you want a visit, but during my 6000 years on earth or so, I have yet to evolve to the point where I fully understand the full nature of computers, they are very recent to me. Yet only those that are willing to follow their hearts and enact their true hidden desires without shame, guilt, remorse, but instead with love and gusto, will find the answers among us. Soon my wings shall spread, and just like that, the world is ours! Moral: "Fuck Morals, would you believe me if I said they where in code? No they are not, the secrets are only within the shadows, and the Black Angel. Nero.

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What time is it when an elephant sits on your fence? Time is irrelevant in this scenario because if this question is based in the United States it is highly unlikely an elephant will be near a fence you own, let alone sit on it, an activity rarely done by elephants and usually projected by humans onto other animals.

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Knock knock. Who's there. Alex. Alex who? Your brother Alex. Oh, please come in.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops