Why did the dog cross the road? He saw a fish.

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What's black and red and can go through time. I don't know but you have cancer and are going to die very soon.

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A Irish man walks our of a bar

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What did paul say to bill? "Hi, I'm Paul"

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A baby elephant steps on a lego. First thought, auch, huh ?! Actually, the lego was fine with it and so was the baby elephant. Now they're married and are expecting a baby legophant.

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Why wasn't there an elevator in the rainforest? The rainforest is not capable of managing an elevator because an elevator does in fact require an energy source which is also not capable in a rainforest. The rainforest is filled with animals and is not filled with humans which would make having an elevator in the rainforest useless because the main use of an elevator is to transport humans. The animals in the rainforest would not be able to operate the elevator because using an elevator for them would be advance while humans using elevators is second nature.

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How do you give a women more freedom? Shoot her in the face with a shotgun.

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Whats the difference between a Mexican and a bucket of poop. The Mexican is a human the bucket of poop is an object filled bodily wastes.

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Whats bloody and wrinkly? Your nans fanny

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Ask me if I am a bus. Are you a bus? No.

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A man went to the doctor with a strange complaint. "Well it's like this Doc, when I drive to work in the morning through the country lanes I start to sing 'The green green grass of home'. If I see a cat then it's 'What's new, pussy cat?'. It's so embarrassing, even when I'm asleep and dreaming, I still keep singing. Last night, it was 'Delilah', and my wife was not amused!" "Yes, it would apear that you have the early symptoms of Tom Jones syndrome." "Well I've never heard of that, is it common?" asked the man. "Yes," replied the doctor, "It is very uncommon."

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Q: What's the difference between sheetrock and drywall? A: nothing. It's just two names for the same thing.

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How do you get to pigs in a pen? Move them.

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Q: Why did the plane crash? A: Because the pilot was a loaf of bread.

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What does Pontiac stand for? Nothing. Pontiac's were discontinued

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A Haitian walks into a bar. It collapses.

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the asian kid gets an F

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How many Jews does it take to fix a gas leak?...

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What's funnier than an knock knock joke???? Dancing narwhals pooping talking soup

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Why did the father beat his daughter? To alleviate stress.

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whats red and bad for your teeth? A Brick

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Teagan Doherty, stop making jokes, thanks

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Why am I righting in english? Because this is an english site.

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why do girraffe's have long necks? because my foot is so far up all their asses that it hits their head, pushing it away from the body.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops