What do retards say when someone knocks on the door... NOBY HOME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!.....................and that concludes our moment of silence

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whats stupid and gay all of my friends

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What was the pirate's favorite letter W

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How do you get an Asian man to build you a computer? Pay him a reasonable amount of money

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Why did the school bus crash? The driver was a loaf of bread.

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Why couldnt the boy lick his elbows? Because he lost his arms after he was violently beaten by his drunk father with a bat.

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What did the polar bear say when he walked into a sauna? Absolutely nothing because he was a polar bear. I mean seriously, did I even have to ask? Everyone should know that a polar bear is an animal and he wouldn't say anything. If he did it would most likely be a growl or a roar. If you believed that he would have said something you obviously didn't pass the first grade. I finish with the fact that a polar bear would not survive in a sauna because they are accustomed to cold clima I guess this was just a waste of time.

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A wife asks her husband if he can fix the sink and he responds with Do I have plumber written on my forehead. Then she asks him if he can fix the porch and he responds with Do I have contractor written on my forehead. So the husband goes on vacation and comes back to find the sink and porch fixed and he asks his wife how it is fixed and she says that the new neighbor helped. So she says the neighbor said he would only do it for cake or sex. The husband respond by saying Which one did you choose. His wife responds by saying Do I have Betty Crocker written on my forehead.

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What did the Farmer say when he lost his tractor? "Wheres my tractor?"

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How do you give a women more freedom? Shoot her in the face with a shotgun.

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The skeleton walks into a bar. Everyone is confused and leaves.

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why did u fart to loud? because you butt said so

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Your mom's so old she sometimes uses outdated racial slurs loudly in public. It can get pretty embarrassing.

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Does this napkin smell like chlorofoam?

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Grab your Taco, you've pulled a dyslexic Mexican

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What do you call a man who eats a swordfish at 11 o'clock? Dead by midnight.

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what did the little boy get for christmas? nothing, he was homeless

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Two black men go inside a movie theater. They sit down and watch the movie.

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I am not Moral Man. Moral: FUUUUUUUUUUUU

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Why was the squirrel late for work? Because the traffic was nuts!

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What do you call a black priest? A black priest

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock, knock. Who's there? Not Sally.

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I see said the blind man to his def wife as the dog with no legs ran over

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A black man named Lawrence was driving a car that wasn't his at 3 a.m. The car belonged to a drunk friend who asked Lawrence to be the designated driver.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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