Whats pink and screaming? a skinned baby in a bucket of vinegar+

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Near the tower of London, a woman says to her friend: "You know, I had a feeling my son would come out, and the other day, he did." "What was your first clue?" "We're British."

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How do you stop a charging rhinocerous? Nuke africa.

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Why can't a black guy be the King of England? He's not in line for it.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? A fat guy. - Louis

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What's worse than an explosion? A nuclear explosion.

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Whats worse than forgetting some thing at the supermarket? your nuts being nail gunned to the wall.

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Q: Do you know what really makes me smile? A: Facial Muscles.

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Chuck Norris doesn't answer the phone - he doesn't have one at the moment

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How many Jews can you fit in a car? Anywhere from 2-8, depending on the size of the vehicle.

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So I was sitting in the doctor's when I noticed a guy sitting about two seats down, wearing a sombrero and pouring salt over himself. Then I found out I had cancer and promptly lost all interest in him.

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whats black? a black man

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why did the giraffe cross the road? because my dad and his "fishing buddies" are having another "meeting" in the basement. I hear weird noises, and I haven't seen my little sister in weeks, since the last "meeting." Dad said she went to a special camp for little girls. I hear horrible noises.

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once upon a time there was a boy

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Why do animals on the side of the road stink? Well they don't, you just think they do when in reality all it is, is there insides rottening From prevous days of exposen of the air now as far as I know all the little baby squrriel Wanted was it get his nuts in the road and it bring back to his starving family counting on him to bring Food to the tree next thing you know a soccer mom's van ran the poor baby squirrel over. Now me knowing this squirrel myself (don't ask me how) he wanted to go out in style you know get ran over by a mustang or a lambo not some bitch ass mini van with sliding doors and a dvd player convinit for the kids to watch spongebob.... man I bet that squrriel was pissed!

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I'll be back. Please use the door.

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Nippies

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what is worse than bitting into your apple and finding a worm? 9/11

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What's the difference Justin Bieber and a Dic* the Dic*

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What kind of shots I'd John take at night? Insulin, because he's a diabetic.

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Three blondes walk into a bar. They have an intellectual conversation over some drinks.

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Why did little Sally fall off the swing? Because she had no arms. Knock Knock. Who's there? Not Sally.

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what does a gorilla do when it sleeps. it snores.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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