What is the hardest part of a vegetable? The wheelchair.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

What's the difference between a black man and a bicycle? ( I don't know. ) You're so racist.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

What do you call a man man with no arms and no legs floating in the ocean? Bob(he is bobbing in the water)

thumb_up thumb_down -7

What's worse than a car going backwards on the highway? A steamroller going backwards on the highway.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

What do you call a fish with no eyes? Blind.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Why did the boy want to commit suicide? Because he didn't want to die.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

whats white and gooy liguid goop

thumb_up thumb_down -7

What did the little boy get for christimas? Nothing because he's a selfish asshole.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Whats the difference between a frog?

thumb_up thumb_down -7

What happened when the kid tried to hang himself? He was overweight, so the ceiling fan that the rope was tied to fell out of the ceiling. When he explained this to his drunk mother when she got home, she reinforced the fact that he was overweight (his low self esteem was the root of his depression) and beat him. The next day, he just chugged antifreeze. This isn't a true story. Just calm down.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

What do you call an African American on the moon? An astronaut

thumb_up thumb_down -7

What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? "Where's my tractor"

thumb_up thumb_down -7

det va en tjej som va inne på ica och handlade, framme vid kassan la hon fram en banan, en billys pizza, ett litet paket bröd och en mjölk. -är du singel eller? frågar killen i kassan -ja hur visste du det, svarar hon -du e skitful ju

thumb_up thumb_down -7

What did the teacher say to the pupil who was bad at maths? You are bad at maths and will never complete any sum EVER!

thumb_up thumb_down -9

What do you call it when you lend money to a bison? Unitelligent, because bison do not have the ability to purchase things with money so it will most likely just eat the money.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

A man walks into his doctor's office He says: ''Doctor, I have said goodbeye to my family and friends and I have decided to take the pills you offered me and die peacefully in my sleep, I won't suffer any longer from my disease''. The doctor answers: ''You are in luck, we still have a few of them left''

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Now this is a story all about how, my life got flipped, turned upside down. Now I'd like to take a minute, just sit right there, and I'll tell you how I lost my job at the tire plant, and how, being out of work and unable to find a new job, I was unable to pay my mortgage. The bank repossessed my house, my wife left me and took custody of the kids, and I ended up having to sell all my remaining possessions and move to a new city in order to try and find employment.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Why did the chicken cross the road? Jupiter is the Galaxys biggest planet!

thumb_up thumb_down -9

8====D~~~~~~

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Why did the mother tell her son to get a job. She was tired of buying Generic brand food.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

What's the difference between a cow and a fat person. Nothing

thumb_up thumb_down -9

I Have a Black Friend

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Three politicians walk into a sports bar. Suddenly, everyone is watching the Stanley Cup playoffs.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

How does the cow say cash i dont know ask him he is the cow.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops