Need an ark to save two of every animal? I noah guy.

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what makes the world go round? An axis (just jokin, its COFFEE)

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What did the duck say to the moose? Quack

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What is Jetlag? When your computer is running too many applications in the background while you're trying to play a game of Jetman so it starts lagging.

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roses arent always red, they can be pink or white. violets are violet, not blue. your pretty lets have sex.

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A baby walks into a bar, I find that very unlikely as very few baby's can actually walk.

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What is a chair?

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Shit Happens....or sometimes it doesn't! As the person is taken to the hospital with severe constipation.

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What did the kid with no arms get for christmas? No one knows he hasn't been able to open his presents yet.

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If a quiz is a quizzical what is a test? A testicle

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Gingers.

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Where do pimps go when they retire? Idaho.

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BenWuzHear

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I tell the Doctor I'm having pains in my chest. He says that sounds serious and admits me immediately to the hospital.

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whats white and lives in a tree a fridge

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A black man, Jew, and Asian walk into a bar... What does the bartender say? get out.

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How are trees and friends alike? They are both subject to fall when struck with an axe.

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What did rosa parks get for christmas? -Racism

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why dont we just take bikini bottom and push it somewhere else

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Q: Whats black, white and red all over? A: not me

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"Ask me if I'm a tree." "Are you a tree?" "No."

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What's pink fluff? Pink fluff. What's blue fluff? Pink fluff holding it's breath. What's red fluff? Angry pink fluff. Ask me if I'm a truck. Are you a tr-- No. What's green and has wheels? Grass. I was just lying about the wheels. What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding half a worm in your apple, 'cause the other half's in your mouth. What's worse than finding half a worm in your apple? Angry pink fluff. What's worse than angry pink fluff? The holocaust. That's not funny. Stop laughing.

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Feeling that your friends do not listen to your insightful conversations? BUY A PARROT! Teach it to say "Uhuh", and "Ahah", and "Dats coo!" NOW YOU CAN BE COMPLETELY APRECIATED BY A FUCKING BIRD THAT DOES NOT KNOW WHAT YOU ARE SAYING... ...BUT IS IT... APPRECIATING IT? DUUUUUUUN DUUUUUUUUN DUUUUUUUUUUUUUUN! MYSTERY!

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A priest, a monk, and a rabbi walk into a bar. They order drinks and keep the conversation to non-controversial topics.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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