Whats yellow and cant swim? A bulldozer

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How do you make bread out of corpses? You don't. You grow it with bread seeds.

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Why can't Albert Einstein hold down a job? Because he's dead.

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What do you do when you see a black child riding a bike? Think to yourself, "Wow you just don't see many kids riding bikes anymore because there too busy playing video games in their basement."

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Knock Knock Whose there? Nobody Nobody who?

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A guy walked up to me and said "I'm a teepee, I'm a wigwam, I'm a teepee, I'm a wigwam." I promptly informed the authorities. The man was transported to a mental institution and I later learned that he swallowed his own tongue and died. Nobody attended his funeral service.

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So, a guy sees a guy, and asks that guy if he's seen a guy who knew this guy who saw this guy who killed this guy, who knew a guy who is Barack Obama's best friend. Oh wait, Barack Obama doesn't have any friends.

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knock knock , who there ray, ray who , ray winstone , I am your daddy you'll get your perks.

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What's the difference between a water melon and a baby? One's fun to hit with a sledge hammer, the other's just a water melon.

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A black man, Jew, and Asian walk into a bar... What does the bartender say? get out.

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Whats the difference between Lady Gaga and Justin Bieber? Lady Gaga has a penis.

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A police officer stops a blonde for speeding and asks her very nicely if he could see her license. She replied in a huff, "I wish you guys could get your act together. Just yesterday you take away my license and then today you expect me to show it to you."

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Whats Black and White and Red all over? A white boy who just got jumped, with sever bruises left lying in a pool of his own blood.

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How do you kill a blonde? Stab her...

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How do you make a Jew cry? You kill all of their friends and family members.

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Why was the man full? He ate a meal.

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A man walks into a bar, and he says, "ow,".

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"Doctor, Doctor I think I am a pair of curtains" The man was swiftly referred to the psychiatric ward.

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Why did the Asian woman drive 20mph on the highway? There was a deadly car accident with many fatalities.

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You Wanna hear an anti joke? Womens rights

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Q. did u see Stevie wonders new house A. no me. neither did he

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Why can't you fly? Cause Ruddell says so.

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How much is a pet whale? $1350.99

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Do you ride the bus to school or do you take your lunch?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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