Have you heard about the Polish hockey team? They're not very good, but what they lack in skills they make up for in enthusiasm and good team spirit.

What did the man say to the duck? Nothing ducks don't talk.

a boy walks into the doctors office."my knees hurt...i poked it like this"the doctor says "listen kid...u are a really good kid but u didnt really injure your knee and im sick of you!!"

A: What did the banana say to the other banana? B: I don't know, what? A: I don't know either, I was hoping you did.

Wow did you see stevie wonder's new house. neither has he

Knock Knock. Who's there? Doctor. Doctor Who? Doctor Watson - I'm here to see your little sister who is currently terminally ill and every second is of vital importance. Therefore this exchange of words is only worsening the already terrible situation that we find ourselves in. Please open the door.

Why couldn't the boy sing? The boy could sing, but the thick layer of duct tape prevented him from doing so.

.ellipsis { text-overflow: ellipsis; /* Required for text-overflow to do anything */ white-space: nowrap; overflow: hidden; }

How do you get a black man out of KFC? Tell him to get out

A: We're eating you for breakfast today. B: Thank you, I'll have my arm.

What did the homeless man get for Christmas? Frostbite.

What do an elephant and grapes have in common? They both have a trunk...except for the grapes

An airplane crashes into a state park. There are no survivors. Susan continues her stroll in the park, considering she is blind, deaf and in a wheelchair, she isn't aware of the nearby disturbance

OY SHIT ITS YOUR MOM!!!

What's funny about using a shake weight? It resembles masturbating with a penis.

The king has three daughters. One day, one of the daughters comes into his room and asks, "Father, why is my name Rose?" King replies,"well, a rose petal fell on your head when you were a baby." The next day, the second daughter comes into his room and asks,"Father, why is my name Tulip?" the king replies,"A tulip fell on your head when you were a bay." On the next day, the final daughter comes in and says, "BLAJSFUAGHASRAKKKKKK." The king says,"Shut up, Cinderblock."

So a man was walking down the street with bananas in his ears when he saw one of his friends coming the other way. When they met up the one friend asked, "Hey you know you've got bananas in your ears?" To which the man replied "What? I can't hear you, I have bananas in my ears."

SOPA gets passed and shuts down anti-joke because KFC claims the picture of the anti-joke chicken

Knock knock Who's there This is the police, open the door. I don't know anybody by that name

Daniel Textor can suck a gooch he's such a F - A - GGGGG!! Let's beat him up at lunch.

Q.If you are European in the bathroom, what are you in the kitchen? A. A woman.

A African American male and a Mexican male are both in a car, who is driving? Most likely the owner or the car.

Roses are red Violets are blue I forgot to go to the bathroom

It's only racist if you consider them people.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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