A duck walked up to a lemonade stand, and he said to the man running the stand "Quack"! because he's a duck... and that's what ducks do.

Why did the chicken cross the road? It couldn't. Before it could cross, it was killed and then consumed by an average American

why did the chicken cross the road??? I don't know, that's why I asked you -_-

Quantum Mechanics is so difficult to understand, somewhere Stephen Hawking just walked into a bar.

Q: How do you kill an Asian? A: Deprive of calculator or shoot it.

A short Irish man and a tall German man went skydiving. Both parachutes coincidentally failed to deploy and they died.

a black kid goes and gets some cereal and spills some flower on him self and he goes to his grandma and says look grandma i`m white and then she slaps him he goes to his grandpa and says look grandpa i`m white and then he slaps him and then he goes to his mom and then says look mom i`m white and then she slaps him then he goes to his dad and then says dad i`ve been white for 20 minutes and i all ready hate yall nigas

Why couldn't Helen Keller drive a car? Because she was deaf and blind and would have been a hazard to herself and others.

What's red and eats tulips? Your face!

Q: What do you call a man with no arms and no legs in the water? A: Bob.

Knock knock. who's there? Alex. GO AWAY!!!

Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven was a homicidal maniac.

A man keeping specific track of time,eagerly waits for a punch line.

Why couldn't the black man swim He never learned how.

How you your turn a trashcan into a semi-automatic AK-47? You don't. But ask the irishman who just said "hello" to you.

What was the first thing the mother did when her baby was born? Weep. The baby was a was a stillborn.

Flop dog

Why did the dog eat poop?

What's so good about being Swiss? Well.... The flag's a big plus

Knock knock, Who's there? The cops, your parents are dead and now you are an orphan.

Roses are 3:18 Violets are 3:18 I Just figured out a pattern. And saved peoples lives with the help of Keifer Sutherland.

why was the boy sleeping in the basement? he was brought over from ethiopia to become a child sex slave and was now being help against his will in a basement

What do you get when you cross a turtle and a kangaroo? A hybrid combination of the two that is characterized by specific traits of both animals.

What's black and blue and hates anal? The twelve year old in my trunk

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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