What's the difference between red paint and blue paint? One looks like blood and is used a lot in restaurants. The other is blue.

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks "Why the long face?" The horse doesn't respond because its a horse and cant speak or understand english and gallops out of the bar knocking over a few tables and stools.

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What is the best invention ever? Taking a crap reverse. So you can enjoy a nice bowl of aids.

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Hey, guess what? What? Dammit!

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What did the pornstar do after the film shoot? Called her parents and said she had a good day at work as a receptionist at a law firm. She is too ashamed to admit her real profession to them. She then cried profusely.

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What did the blonde say when she tripped down the stairs? Nothing she was unconscious and had a serious concussion.

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What happened to the man who sat outside in the sun too long? He died of skin cancer.

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Why did Billy go into the white van? Because his parents came to pick him up from school.

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What did the duck say to the moose? Quack

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Why did the boy throw butter out the window? Because he had uncontrollable muscle spasms.

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Why doesn't the South Pole war veteran remember the name of his child? He is a penguin and could care less about naming his children. Why doesn't the penguin on the North Pole remember the name of his child? There are no penguins on the North Pole.

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How do you drown a down syndrome child? Put him/her into water.

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What is Worse than the holocaust?

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Whats something really annoying? A guy who presses enter too much. hehe

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Tom and Phill are eating ice cream Tom challenges Phill to a contest to see who can eat their ice cream in one bite Tom finishes his in two bites Phil in one Then he looks like he got a brain freeze Tom notices and says "You idiot: you got brain freeze!" Phill turns around and says "No, I have a brain tumor."

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Two guys go hunting and one of them aims the sniper at the other guy's house and says "I see your wife's cheating on you again with another man" he replies "I've had it with her, shoot him in the privates and shoot her in the mouth" the friend says "I'll get that in one shot".

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who is the wildest wild one? matt daly

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A man walks into a bar. ouch.

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Q: Wgat did Batman say to Robin before Robin got in the car? A: "Robin, get in the car"

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Once upon a time there was a nice old man who loved to ride his bike... He unfortunately died when he had a heart attack.

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What did America get on the 11th September? 9/11

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What do you call a dinosaur that wears a cowboy hat and boots? It depends on what his name is.

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Why did the woman lie down? She was dead

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Whats worse than being a student? Being raped.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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