Why was the T-Rex so bad at math? Cause it was stupid

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What's black and white and red all over it? Not a newspaper because red is not all over it. Answers to this question may vary.

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What's black and twelve inches long? A Maglite.

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Why do black people enjoy watermelon? Because it tastes good.

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What did the passive-aggressive woman do to her husband? She killed him. As it turns out, the slight passive-aggressive behavior she was showing was actually an early warning sign of a dangerous sociopathic mental disorder. The authorities are looking for her as we speak and will have her institutionalized as soon as they find her.

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Cat got your tongue? Punch it in the face, and retrieve your tongue.

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Why did the baby fall out the window? Because the parents left the window open by the crib.

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What's the difference between Rebecca black and your mom? Capitalize Black.

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What lights up a soccer stadium? A soccer match.

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What do you call a penis without hair? Apple sause

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What do you call it when someone walks on another person's head? It depends. Face up, fetish. Face down, hate crime.

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It's a man's 100th birthday, and as one of his last wishes he wants to go skydiving. Unfortunately, due to his crippling arthritis, he was unable to pull the rip cord on his parachute and plummeted to his death.

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The patient says, "Give me the bad news first!" Doctor replies, "You've got AIDS." "Oh, no! What could be worse than that?" asks the patient. "You've also got Alzheimer's Disease." Looking relieved the patient says, "Oh...Well, that's not so bad. At least I don't have AIDS."

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How do gay guys have sex with women?? They dont, they are gay.

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What do you call a man with a cigar in his mouth. A person with bad health and dirty teeth.

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once upon a time, a bird fell in love with a fish.. they both died.

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What's worse than the Holocaust? Finding a worm in your apple. What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? A Holocaust survivor.

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What did the Pope say to the little boy? Look both ways before crossing the street

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Little Davie was a kid with no arms and legs and one day his friends Came to his house and knocked on the door and asked for little Davie And asked if he wanted to come play baseball..Little Davie replied "I'd Love to but I have no arms or legs" his friends say we know that..We were Just needing a second base..

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What did the thin Italian say to the fat Italian? I don't know, I can't speak Italian.

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Why was the black man hand cuffed by a woman cop? Because they are a married couple who feel like role play will help spark their sex life again.

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Whats the differense between a pile of dead babies and a Farrari I actually have a Farrari in my garage.

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What's yellow and highly dangerous? Shark-infested banana pudding.

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Why did Helen Keller's cat kill itself? It didn't, I did.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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