There's a plane with 5000 bricks in it, one falls out. How many bricks are on the plane now? 4999 How do you get an elephant in the fridge? U open the fridge,put the elephant in and close the fridge. How do you get a deer in the fridge? Open the fridge, take the elephant out and close the fridge. A lion is trowing a party and the whole animal kingdom shows up, what animal isn't there? The deer cause he's still in the fridge. A little old lady is walking threw an alligator and snake invested swamp. *The snakes and alligators eat her (wrong answer) The brick falls on her head

What rhymes with shuck and starts with an f flamethrower

Hey guess what! We're birthday buddies! May 3rd.. Yeah that's why you should give me 5 bucks.

There was a cat, an astronaut and a nun. The cat was sleeping, the astronaut was floating, and the nun was praying. There was a singer, a dancer and an actor. The singer was singing, the dancer was dancing, and the actor was acting.

Whats Something everyone has except david? Money.

What do you call a kid with no arms and an eyepatch? Names.

Back when I was your age, we had to entertain ourselves with video games and TV.

So the docter saw the girl had a "M" on her chest during surgery. He asked her if he had a boyfreind from Michigan. She said "no, but i have a girlfreind from winsconsin, why do u ask?"rf

What did the blind orphan get for christmas? Cancer

When is the best time to eat? When you feel like it.

Yeah right loser!

Jamie stegman is a masive idiot and does not have a life at all he is a tool which is true becuase no one likes him

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What is the difference between a bucket of shit and a Jew? The Bucket.

how do you get out of a room with no windows or doors? you don't.

knock knock come back later i'm taking a shower!!!

Why was the Mexican socially inept. Because he hadn't recieved a good education

IM SEXY AND I KNOW IT Chrysanthemums are pretty but toads and people are damn to horny

Membean

press Ctrl and F4 on ur key pad

your momma is so stupid it took her 2 hours to watch 60 minutes

once upon a time there was a boy

What is 0% sugar, 100% pure, 150% hyperbole, 90% bug-free, has 4815162342 lines of code, autonomous, is awesome, bigger than a breadbox, bread is pain, is bringin' home the bacon, classy, doesn't use the U-word, deja vu, deja vu (oh wait a moment), does barrel rolls doesn't avoid double negatives, doesn't bother with clones, Engage!, Enhanced!, Euclidean!, Excitement!, Exploding creepers, Finally complete!, finger-licking, full of stars, funky LOL, GOTY, Give Us Gordon, Indev, Ingots, and has an End? Minecraft!

Why did the first Monkey fall out of the tree? He was dead. Why did the second Monkey fall out of the tree? He was tied to the first Monkey. Why did the third Monkey fall out of the tree? He thought it was a game.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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