How do you get money out of a Jew? You convince him your cause is worthwhile.

What did the blind boy get for Christmas? The same toys from last year.

When life gives you lemons, chuck them at the creepy man across the block.

Knock Knock Who's there? A bag of burning crap.

What do an elephant and grapes have in common? They both have a trunk...except for the grapes

A black man went on the bus and sat down next to a white man. The white man looked up from his magazine and stared at the black man. They then chit-chatted and enjoyed their trip.

You know how to torture Hellen Keller? -No. Put a plunger in the toilet.

What do you call a dolphin that drives a Mercedes Benz? Nothing. Dolphins can't drive.

Jennifer Kim is the nicest person I have ever met, everyone loves her.

Knock Knock. Who's there? James. Ok.

3 Jews walk into a bar. Few minutes later a penny is dropped. This resenct occation causes a bar fight to brake out.

When life gives you lemon squeeze it in someone's face

What time is it when an elephant sits on your fence? Time to call animal control.

What is difference about : Pizza and Jews on the Holocaust? Pizza don't scream when she gets into the oven!

John Rustenburg at the dinner table

WNBA

How can you tell if your goldfish is male or female? Put some fishfood in the bowl, if he swims to the food it's a male, if she swims to the food it's a female.

How do u bring a dead person to life? U dont.

Nicole Ritchie walks into a grocery store.

What time is it when an elephant sits on your fence? Time is irrelevant in this scenario because if this question is based in the United States it is highly unlikely an elephant will be near a fence you own, let alone sit on it, an activity rarely done by elephants and usually projected by humans onto other animals.

whats worse than finding the holocaust on your forehead? a mono brow

what goes up and down , and left and right all day without breaking a sweat? A compass, get your mind out of the gudder.

What number comes after 29? 30.

Q: Why does my arm itch? A: I got bit on the arm by a mosquito

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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