Why has Bugs Bunny got big ears? Because he's a rabbit

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*knock knock* "who's there?" "me, the person who knocked..duh"

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What do you call a black man eating fried chicken? By his name, which could be John, considering the popularity of said name.

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Knock, Knock Who's there? Milkman! Milkman who? ....Timmy....I've been coming here for FOURTEEN YEARS! AND YOU CAN'T EVEN REMEMBER MY NAME?!?! I drove your mom to the hospital when you were born since your father is such a deadbeat. I helped pick out your name!! I'm sorry I wasn't born into wealth like you. I'm sorry I have to go door to door handing out milk for other people! I have been coming here every week for FOURTEEN YEARS! But no Timmy, no, don't try to remember my name. Just forget about all the laughs we have had. Or that time i left my family on Christmas because your mother needed me to go find you that Turbo man doll. I saved you from a burning vehicle! I helped you win your third grade science fair! Remember? I have a picture of us and that robot right here in my wallet. I show it to people all the time! Here's me and my...my pal Timmy. Well Timmy, this is it. You shan't see me again.

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A black man walks into a bar. The bartender says "I wont serve you." The black man says, "Why? Is it because of the color of my skin?" The bartender says, "No, its because your wearing a suit and on the front door it says no people in suits are allowed." So the black man took off his suit and was kindly served.

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Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? At age two, she contracted an illness that left her blind, deaf, unable to speak, and was considered backwards of intelligence. She lived in a dark and hopeless world of her own, rendering her unable to do anything, let alone drive.

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What has two wheels and a handle bar? A bike.

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Why did the little boy drop his ice cream? he was epileptic

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How do you kill a blonde? you shoot her.

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What time is it when an elephant sits on your car? 12:00

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What did the dog say when the woman put a sweater on him? Nothing, dogs can't talk and he has no idea what is going on

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What did the black say when an asian knocked him out? Nothing, he was knocked out

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Why was Joey bad at playing the trumpet? He had no fingers.

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I TOOK A STEAMING SHIT ON YOUR MOM

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Once upon a cross

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What was the pirate movie rated? PG-13 for violence and mild nudity.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Your family is dead, I killed them.

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Q: What's bigger than a volcano? A: Earth

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

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What can you eat that comes in all different flavors. Chex mix, I bet you thought it was women but its not its chex mix

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You're Adopted.

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When Nicki Minaj wrote her song "Stupid Hoe" she was sublimminally talking about her self.

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Q: what's better than ice cream A: not having aids

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What happens when you lose your fish? It dies.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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