How do you wake up lady gaga? Shoot her in the head repeatedly

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Two men walk into a bar. One gets drunk, goes home, savagely beats his wife, and goes to jail for domestic abuse.

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How do you drown a fish? You can't , it is physically Impossible to drown a fish. because they have gills, so they are able to breathe underwater.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Hello Carolina, let me lick your vagina.

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Knock knock Who's there? Honey, just let me in. This bloody game can't go on for an hour. I'm cold out here.

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Q: What did the Kool-Aid Man say when he crashed through a wall? A: "OW! That hurt!"

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What did the hat say to the other hat? Nothing, because hats don't talk, stupid.

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what do u call a long dik gay guy Gay Dickerson

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What do you call a black man that sells drugs? A pharmacist.

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Never bring a knife to a sword fight Bring A GIANT FREAKING HIPPOPOTAMUS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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When life hands you lemons, you should question your sanity

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What did Jim say to Bob? Hi Bob.

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? Because a tree fell on her. Knock Knock Who's There? Not Sally...

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Two men walk into a bar. The third one ducks.

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What do you call a joke with no punchline?

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What do you call a penis without hair? Apple sause

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Why did god smite the homosex man with all of heavens wrath? For shits and gigs.

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Mary had a little lamb, little lamb, little lamb Mary had a little lamb and the doctor was surprised

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What has two legs but can't walk? A quadriplegic man who lost mobility in his legs due to a horrific logging accident.

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Psychic wanted. You know where to apply.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, i got 5 Fingers, the middle ones for you ?

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There once was a man from Nantucket. He loved working with tourists.

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whats 2+2? math.

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Did you hear about the Blonde who fell off a cliff You Have? Oh Ok, Have a nice day

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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