Two men walk into a bar. You would have thought one of them would have seen it.

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What did the big chimney say to the smaller chimney? Nothing chimneys don't talk

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Knock knock Who's there? Boo Boo who? It's just a joke you don't have to cry about it

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Your Mom is so fat... I'm sorry I didn't mean that.. I have abandonment issues.

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If a tree falls on a cat in the woods, does it make a sound? Yes and no, the tree falling makes a loud noise, but the cat under it is instantly killed, preventing any sound that would of been made by the now crushed feline.

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Uh, summa lumma dooma lumma you assuming I'm a human What I gotta do to get it through to you I'm superhuman Innovative and I'm made of rubber, so that anything you say is Ricochet in off a me and it'll glue to you And I'm devastating more than ever demonstrating How to give a motherfuckin' audience a feeling like it's levitating Never fading, and I know that haters are forever waiting For the day that they can say I fell off, they'll be celebrating 'Cause I know the way to get 'em motivated

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? Because her dad through a fridge at her

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What did the man say after falling off the bridge? He didn't say anything. He died a terrible and painful death on impact.

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A blonde and a brunette are stuck on a desert island, they later died of starvation.

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What's worse than kicking your dog? Eating it.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because people have encroached on it's natural habitat.

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Lady Gaga didn't have anything to wear to the playboy party.

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How much wood could a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood? Well, there is no way to accurately estimate this number being that 1.woodchucks in fact do not chuck wood and 2. there is no time frame given for said action to take place

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what's brown and sticky? a stick.

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How did the guy feel after his wife died? Pretty shitty, I'd imagine..

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She said no

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A white person at Harvard

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What is worse than the Haulocost? Running across Africa with KFC

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What did the finger say to the thumb? I'm in glove with you.

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What happened to the dog who lost its legs? It Died.

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Get in the car.

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guys stop with the jewish jokes anne frainkly its getting old

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What do you call you're mum? Depends who's reading it or just mum

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~Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? ~ ~He was dead. ~ ~Why did the chicken fall out of the tree? ~ ~He was stapled to the monkey!!!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops