How do you shoot a basketball? With your hands

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What do you call a homosexual in the army? A brave and honorable person who should be applauded for their service to this great nation

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How did the snail travel around the world without any help from a transportation device? Sadly, it didn't. The snail is incapable of this kind of long distance travel due to it's small size, lack of speed and short lifespan.

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Q. why are black people so good at sports? A. Hardwork and dedication.

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How many babies does it take to paint a wall red? Well babies don't have the strength or coordination to hold a paint brush, so you may need to call some painters.

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what is the difference between Stephani and a whale? A whale is skinnier... get the harpoonns

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YO MAMA SO SHORT she should really consider wearing long tunic-like blouses, prints that contain vertical stripes, and heeled shoes with a pointed toe in order to create the illusion of length to her silhouette. That having been said, society's limited definition of beauty is quite inadequate for the diverse world in which we live.

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Why did the girl drop out of school? She was being sexually assaulted by her mothers alcoholic boyfriend and was having trouble coping.

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What did the one bagpiper say to the other? Nothing, one cannot speak while playing the bagpipes.

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What did the boy with no arms and legs get for Christmas? A treadmill... did I mention he was kinda fat?

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A man walks into a bar . . . he is tired and thirsty after a long day at work.

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Knock Knock Knock Knock Knock Knock The person you are seeking is deaf and cannot hear the sound that is made when your knuckles come in contact with the door. Try calling next time..........

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i feel like when the radish was discovered someone was like "hey lets call it rad!" and another guy was like "lets dial it down a bit"

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What's invisible and smells like a carrot? A rabbit's fart.

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How many blondes does it take to change a lightbulb? One. This task does not require over 1 person to complete.

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Steven hawking walks into a bar. a.w j.p

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Whats funny about the Holocaust? Nothing.

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I am not Moral Man. Moral: FUUUUUUUUUUUU

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Chuck Norris once walked into a strip club, and had quite a nice time indeed!

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Which came first, the chicken , the egg, the chick, the dinosaur, or the fried chicken nuggets?

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Captain Falcon is eating a restaurant. After he sits down at his table, a waiter comes by to take his drink order. Not wanting to skew his blood alcohol level for his next race, he asks for a non-alcoholic drink. The waiter says, "We only have water and punch. Which would you like?" Captain Falcon replies, "Water, please."

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Q.What do you call a black man flying a plane? A. A black pilot you racist bastard

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Q: Why did the plane crash? A: Because the pilot was a loaf of bread.

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What do you call a black guy selling drugs. A pharmisict.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops