how do you blindfold an asian...a piece of dental floss

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What do you call it when Justin Bieber has sex with a woman? Intercourse.

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Knock knock. Come in.

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Why couldn't sally go on the swing? Because she has no arms. Knock knock Who's there Sally

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A woman walks into a cave, and the entrance collapses. She spends two days in the cave. She comes close to death, due to lack of nutrition, but is thankfully rescued by a dog walker. She spends several days in hospital recovering. The experience really opens her eyes to life, and she learns not to take her loved ones for granted, and to really make the most of her life. Finally she is allowed to go home. The next day, she is hit by a bus.

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A young blind boy is being tucked into bed by his mother. The mom says "Now Billy, pray really hard tonight and tomorrow, your wish will come true!". Billy says, "Ok mommy." and goes to sleep. The next morning, Billy wakes up and screams "MOMMY! I'm still blind, my wish didn't come true!", the mom answered, "I know - April Fools!"

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Whats worse than 911..? The plane ride there.

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Three women are sent to heaven. Theres a blond , brunette , and a redhead. There are 100 steps to heaven and on every step god tells you a joke and you cant laugh. The redhead makes it to step 23 then laughs. The brunette makes it to step 67 then laughs. Finally the blond make it all the way to the 100th step and before god can tell the joke she laughs. God asks why are u laughing? And the blond says " i just got the 1st one"!

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What's brown and sticky? The faeces of a glue stick.

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who is the wildest wild one? matt daly

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Knock-knock. Who's there? Me.

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matty russel are you on here

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Why did the tissue dance? Because it had a boggie

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How many babies does it take to change a light bulb? No amount of them could ever figure it out. They all tremble with fear in the dark.

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What's the best Medieval job? A Jester because you get to play with balls all day.

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Q: why was the movie called the last house on the left? A: because they went to the last house that was on the left.

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your momma is so fat that she thinks someone hugs her each time she passes through a door

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What is black and white and red all over? a nun that got raped.

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Why was six afraid of seven? because seven had diarrhea

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Hitler arrives at his neighbor's barmitzfah... fashionably late.

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Studies show that 95% of house fires are caused by fire.

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An Englishman, an Irishman and a Scotsman walk into a bar. They have trouble understanding each other.

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What do you get when you cross The Incredible Hulk and King Kong? Two angry fictional characters.

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Is this the krusty krab? NO! THIS IS red lobster, how many i help you?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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