What's the difference between a duck

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Men, get on the boat.

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What did the kid say when he fell of a cliff and met Tom jones? Hi

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A little boy and a pedafile are walking through the forest at night. The little boy says "I'm scared." The pedafile says "You're scared? I have to walk home alone."

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Nippies

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What did one paper bill say to the other? Did you hear about one of us getting replaced by a woman? It's like Bruce to Caitlyn!

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Womans profesional lacrosse

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A black man and a white man walk into a bar, "what will it be" said the bartender. Milk, chocolate milk.

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A Chinese man, an American man, and a Mexican man are sitting in an airplane. When the flight attendant comes by with food, the Chinese and American both opt for pretzels, while the Mexican prefers crackers and makes his selection accordingly. The three sit back and enjoy their snacks separately.

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Chuck Norris was once approached by a woman for whom he had to fight a man to obtain all while doing a mundane activity in an unorthodox manner. He promptly declined for he is married and told the man he only fights for self-defense. He proceeded to put his pants on one leg at a time like everybody else.

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What's worse then finding a finger in your Chili? Getting Mollested by a Pterodactyl.

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What's worse than finding a pickle in a jar? Finding Snooki in a jar.

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What did the teacher say to the pupil who was bad at maths? You are bad at maths and will never complete any sum EVER!

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Why did the black man have to stand in the bus? All of the other seats were taken.

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Chuck Norris doesn't answer the phone - he doesn't have one at the moment

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What's worse than stubbing your toe? Nothing.

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knock knock go away

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what does a gorilla do when it sleeps. it snores.

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Why did Hitler kill the Jews? He didn't, the people he told to kill them did.

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God is almighty, as such he ANSWERS TO NO ONE! Moral: What you praying for then bitch?

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Once upon a time there was a cat named Martin. He died.

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Who has fair skin, blonde hair and is African? Stefan.

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whats the difference between a flamingo ? because the pyramid has a high cholesterol

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KNOCK KNOCK who's there? hello is anybody there? hello?....... .....the number your trying to reach has been removed please hang up the door knob and put the squirrel back in the lawnmower were it belongs.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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