Whats green and if it fell out of a tree it would kill you? A golf course

What was so special about Anne Frank's diary? Nothing. ZeNaziGermanDoctor

Why did the cow jump over the moon ? This is a highly unlikely situation , therefore the cow did not leave its humble pasture , let alone talk english while in the midst of jumping over a planet wich takes days to fly over .

Why did the Mexican drive off a cliff Because he lost control of his vehicle which resulted in an unplanned trajectory causing his car to divert from the intended course and thus veer off the road onto the cliff

What's worse than a pile of dead babies? There's an alive one at the bottom what's worse than that? He ate his way out what's worse than that? He enjoyed it

why did the grinch steal christmas? The grinch had a rough childhood. he had an abusive father and a crack cocaine addicted mother, and as a result, the grinch never got a christmas of his own. The grinch steals the happiness of christmas from the who's becuase his horrible childhood has caused him to take his anger out on everyone around him, because the grinch believes that this will make up for his depressing childhoofd

What lumpy and pointy? A horny woman with breast cancer

one day four teenage boys started doing drugs. They jumped off a cliff and died.

Why do gay guys like push pops? Because they are a delicious lollipop treat.

What's so good about being Swiss? Well.... The flag's a big plus

black people - basketball rednecks- nascar mexicans- soccer asians- uuuuuh I don't know can i get a hint

what do you call a blond who likes human flesh a cannibal

Why did the blonde get fired from the M&Ms factory? Because she slapped the boss when he made a pass at her. Afterwhich she reported the incident to her Union and the boss was fired for Sexual Harassment. She was then rehired with a substantial increase in salary.

Why did John kill Maris? Because Maris killed his family.

Knock knock. "Who's there?" I am deaf. "I am deaf who?" What?

A man walks into a bar and the barenter says, "What'll it be?" The man says, "I'll take a Bud Light."

What did the hobo say while giving birth? bob come over here and hold my third leg for me??

A zombie walks into a bar. It was shot by an M16 automatic rifle. The video game had zombies.

Why did the pirate say to the donkey? Rrrrrrrrrrr you a donkey?

What's black and white and red all over? A mime lying in a pool of blood.

What did he African say when he had diarrhea? Shit

Why is six afraid of seven? Because seven is a registered sex offender.

What did one muffin say to the other muffin? Muffins can't speak therefor it said nothing.

A straight A star quarterback in his senior year of high school was about to throw the game winning pass in his season's last game and complete the school's undefeated record when he was sacked by a defender. He fell incorrectly and broke both of his legs, rendering all of his scholarships invalid. He hasn't walked since.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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