Who am I? Your name is Harvey Jackson. Let's get you dressed so we can go downstairs for dinner. Nurse Holland will be helping you in a few moments.

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A Black man, a Mexican, and a Midget, get in a car. They drive to the county fair and get snow cones and have a really fun time.

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Why did the kitchen cross the road?

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How do you lose your train of thought? You can't. It is impossible to fit a full size locomotive in the human skull.

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In Soviet Russia it is normally colder than america and most people speak russian.

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A horse walked into a bar. The bartender asked, "Why the long face?" The horse did not reply because he was incapable of speech.

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why did the chicken cross the road??? I don't know, that's why I asked you -_-

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- What's the difference between a squirrel? - It can neither fly.

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A man walks into a bar, he has a terrible drinking problem and he is ruining his family.

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Why did the tissue dance? Because it had a boggie

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A blind guy walks into a bar because he can't see.

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Knock, Knock! Cum inside ;;)

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Dogs in my home.

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Why can't George Washington sit up straight? He's dead.

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A child is in the grocery checkout with their parents. It sees the candy display and asks for a pack of Reese's. When the parents do not grant the child's request, they begin to scream and cry. When they arrive home, the child is beaten with a copper rod. The new puppy that the child got for a birthday present is hanged and fed to buzzards.

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What's the difference between a fine wine and a dead baby in a blender? One gets better as it ages, and the other is a horrific accident.

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What did the little boy say after he was pushed off the cliff? Nothing. He died, therefore, he is incapable of speaking.

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Hey I just met you, and this is Crazy, but I think I Love You, so have my baby! ;)

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Cleveland winning something

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A man walks into a bar Then another man shoots him in the head because he has anger issues.

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"KNOCK KNOCK". I opened the door to greet my guests for the party.

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Q: What do you call a women with 2 bowling pins? A: A women with 2 bowling pins.

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if dave has 50 candy bars and eats 45 what does he have? diabeties.

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Why did a boy drop his ice cream? The Holocaust.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops