Hey we just met And this is crazy But my name's Kony And I stole your baby

One cold winter day in Russia, a man asked a tree if he was cold. The tree did not reply, and the man became depressed.

What is Kanye West's main goal in life? To crush the hopes and dreams of singing stars on national television, beginning with Taylor Swift.

Knock knock Who's there? Batman Batman who? Because he was

What did the boy do when he struck out in his little league game? He was very upset and contemplated not playing the game anymore.

Why is America so great? Because the continent is really large.

What do you call a kid with no arms and an eye patch? Names! *ba dum chzz*

what did the terorist do when he went out side blew up

How do you make a plumber cry? Kill his family

roses are red violets are blue my cat died and i have alsheimers who are you

What do you do if a blonde throws a pin at you? Run, 'cause she's got a grenade in her mouth!

A black guy is lying on the floor dead with a knife next to him, what killed him? Multiple bullets sprayed from an uzi being held by a rival gang member....

yo mamma so fat she got pied to be the Olympic swimming pool

What's brown and sticky? The faeces of a glue stick.

What's pink fluff? Pink fluff. What's blue fluff? Pink fluff holding it's breath. What's red fluff? Angry pink fluff. Ask me if I'm a truck. Are you a tr-- No. What's green and has wheels? Grass. I was just lying about the wheels. What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding half a worm in your apple, 'cause the other half's in your mouth. What's worse than finding half a worm in your apple? Angry pink fluff. What's worse than angry pink fluff? The holocaust. That's not funny. Stop laughing.

Why did the irishman go to the bar? because he was a designated driver and was picking up his friend.

why was the pen lonely? because it didn't have a pen pall

#Hanging Degus

I am nobody Nobody is perfect Therefore, I am perfect

Why did the blonde walk into the wall? I lied it was nathaniel nugnes

How many wooden chairs can a black man staple to a whales forehead? 27 because Helen Keller does not like blueberries.

Two english guys meet at work

Why did the chicken cross the road? It felt like it.

Why was six afraid of seven? Seven looked angry and had a gun.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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