What do you call a black man flying a plane? A pilot

Q: What do you call a black hitchhiker? A: A hitchhiker

whats used in the kitchen and hurts like fuck? a cheese-grater dildo

a blonde, a brunette and a red head are robbing a bank, they hear the police coming, so they try to find a place to hide. The red head hides in cat cage, the brunette hides in dog cage and the blonde hides in potatoe sack. When the police come the brunetter says "Woof, Woof!" the red head says "MEOW! MEOW!" and the blonde says "P-O-T-A-T-O-E!"

I saw a woman get donkey punched in the middle of the street. Nero the clit collector: You know... What is it called when A donkey kinda lifts its front hoove and hits a woman? ...WHAT? DO YOU KNOW HOW MANY PEOPLE STARVE TO DEATH BECAUSE OF YOUR COIN COLLECTION? YOUR STAMPS ARE MURDER! (or something) At least my uh... "Friends" survive... SOMETIIIIIIIIMEEEEEEEEES!!!!!!! ...And then I kill them.

Knock knock. Who's there. Alex. Alex who? Your brother Alex. Oh, please come in.

If a tree falls on a cat in the woods, does it make a sound? Yes and no, the tree falling makes a loud noise, but the cat under it is instantly killed, preventing any sound that would of been made by the now crushed feline.

25

What does the man do to his meat? He beats it.

What's blue and says "Good morning" A blue sign that says good morning

What type of ruler lies? A shatter resistant one

what do you call a guy who makes racist jokes? an insensitive bastard

What's the difference between a baby and a watermelon? One is fun to smash and the other one is a watermelon.

How could the teacher tell that the student was dead? logic

What happened to the boy with AIDS? He died at the age of 12

Why was the old man on the floor? He fell

A blind 1st grader is doing math. He can't figure out a problem so he asks his mom to help, his mom then ask "Why don't you just count by your fingers?" the little boy then said "MOM! I'm blind I can't see!" his mom replys "then how do you see your homework?" the boys replys "I opened my eyes, now help me"

Your mom is so fat, she suffers from heart disease, high blood pressure, and type 2 diabetes.

What is large, white, and can't climb trees? A refrigerator.

Why did the Asian woman drive 20mph on the highway? There was a deadly car accident with many fatalities.

A man with a ski mask leaves a jewelry store He then goes back because he accidentally took the clerk's pen

What do you call a fish with no eyes? A blind fish, who had a horrible accident with a fishing hook

...this makes a cop throw a car and then call "inception!"

A Muslim terrorist walks onto a bus, with the mindset to blow him and the other 27 people. Before he steps onto the bus, he realizes the error in his ways and decides to not follow through. He goes to the airport instead.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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