What's worse than spending time with your girlfriend? Nothing.

How did the girl get hit by a car? Better question, How did the car get in the kitchen?

How do 5 gay teenagers walk? In 'One Direction"

How do you get a women stop running a marathon? You tell her that you have AIDS and she should get herself checked.

why did the monkey fall out of the tree? because it was DEAD!

Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven ate the chicken.

how many alzheimer's patients does it take to change a lightbulb? usually one but depending on the severity of the patients' case the lightbulb will be changed by a person who is willing to offer their assistance as to prevent any form of accident taking place.

water, hydrated silica, glycerin, sorbitol, PVM/MA copolymer, sodium lauryl sulfate, flavor, cellulose gum, sodium hydroxide, propylene glycol, carrageenan, sodium saccharin, titanium dioxide all adds up to colgate. SO AS A MATTER OF FACT, CHEESE PLUS PIE IS CHICKEN. CONSIDERING THE FACT THAT I LIKE SAYING CHEESE, JACK AND JILL WENT UP THE HILL BECAUSE THEY WERE BAGELS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

The nurse at a hospital came out of the delivery room and chucked the baby down the hall to the father. The dad starts crying and the nurse starts laughing and said, "It's ok, it was already dead."

A player under the tag "KiTcHeNGuRLxGaMerZ143" got a message after finishing a map on call of duty. "lol ur good."

Why did the chicken sneeze? Because someone put pepper on its nose.

Why did the dog stop barking. It was given a good reason to.

Why did the hipster burn his mouth? He ate the mac and cheese before it was cool.

Where's Waldo? It is impractical to search for him because he's just going to get lost on another page once you find him. You assume he was murdered and get on with your life.

why do woman travel in packs? because men don't travel like the sisterhood in the traveling pants

Your MUM has aids :D LOL

How many New Yorkers does it take to screw in a lightbulb? usually one new yorker.

Whats the worst part of having a Birthday on Feb. 29th? You only get facebook birthday wishes every 4 years.

O: How do you kill a black man? A: Shoot him

I dont know if you know this but i have a penis

what do you call anybody eating at mcdohnalds? hungry, diabetic people

What happens to a warehouse on a full moon? Nothing

Why did the cat land on it's back.... because its dead .......

A white man and a black man were walking down the street. The black borrowed the white man's phone to make a quick call when an incoming call came in. The black man, while trying to hand the phone back, says, "Here, it's your Dad." The white man replies, "No, that's my phone." Amazed at how uneducated the black man was.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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