My grandmother always said "slow and steady wins the race."...... She died in a fire

KNOCK KNOCK! Who's there? KNOCK KNOCK! Umm... Who's there? KNOCK KNOCK! OMG I SWEAR TO GOD WHO THE HECK IS THERE?!?!? KNOCK KNOCK! *opens door* Oh.... It was a woodpecker...

If life throws you melons, not only might you be dyslexic, but you are probably also uneducated, since the phrase is "if life gives you lemons".

Whats Black and White all Over? Ask Your Mother

Why did the cashier let the jockey off 10 cents? because he was short 10 cents

Why did the chicken cross the playground? Thats what she said

Wanna here a joke? Canadians.

Q. Why did the woman fall out of the tree? A. Cause she got laid

roses are blood violets are veins vampires are crazy and you are insane

A politician from the National Country Party keeps interjecting - "I'm a country member, i'm a country member' "yes we remember" says Gough whitlam

Jersey Shore

What is more dangerous than heroine? T.J. Lane

matty russel are you on here

Fortunately," said the snooty maître d', "we'll let you come in without a Thai.

What do you call a black man who has become a millionare? A financhaly successful buisnessman who worked hard to be where he is today.

"What do you call a man who has bumblebee wings and fire for blood?" (The doctor on the other line has no answer. Tom desperately weeps into the phone, trying to grasp his sudden transformation. He finds no reassurance, and hangs up the phone.)

Rigo your a stupid ass

four little monkeys jumping on the bed... one fell of and bumped his head... mama called the doctor and the doctor said... im calling child protection services.

A man decides to go hunting in the woods with a shotgun, he is going through the woods and a bear randomly pops out of no where, knocks him down and rapes him. So the next day he came back with an even bigger shotgun and said, "i am going to kill this bear" so he goes through the woods, the bear comes out of nowhere, knocks him down and rapes him again. So he comes back the next day with and even bigger shotgun and says, " i am going to kill this bear, skin it, and eat it" so hes going through the woods and out comes the bear, knocks him down, gets real close to his face and says, "you dont come out here for the hunting do ya".

roses are red violets are blue you know what? im sick and tired of this joke.

you'r mom is so fat that whenever she goes to the doctors, they are concerned about her cholesterol levels and high blood pressure.

Why did kurt cobain kill himself? He was experiencing heavy depression

Whats the diffrence between a boy scout and a Jew? The boy scout comes back from camp.

Q: What did Stevie Wonder eat for dinner last night? A: Something consumable

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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