What do you do if a blonde throws a pin at you? Run, 'cause she's got a grenade in her mouth!

you know whats funny... nothing.

What does a bartender say to almost all of his customers? May I please see your I.D.

A Haitian walks into a bar. It collapses.

Whats the difference between a corvette and a pile of dead babies? One is a specific type of sports car, and the other is a sad destruction of many young lives

How do you call a black man selling fruits ? Yes, but I'm not sure

Why was a group of children being driven away by a black man? Michael was the students bus driver, he was taking them to the zoo.

Knock Knock Who's there? The police. The police who? Sir, your wife has been killed. Please open the door so that we may discuss this matter. The man then opens the door and listens to the tale of how a disgruntled worker opened fire in a grocery store, killing 13 people including his wife. Unable to cope with this and the fact both his parents passed away earlier that year he later hangs himself soon after the police leave.

Hey I just met you And I am crazy So I will kill you And eat your body

What do giant panda bears eat? giant bamboo

Tom and Phill are eating ice cream Tom challenges Phill to a contest to see who can eat their ice cream in one bite Tom finishes his in two bites Phil in one Then he looks like he got a brain freeze Tom notices and says "You idiot: you got brain freeze!" Phill turns around and says "No, I have a brain tumor."

How many cows does it take to put in a lightbulb? Well, you see, it depends how many cows it takes to put in a lightbulb.

What's worse than genital warts? Herpes. You can get rid of warts

What did the boy with no arms and legs get for Christmas? A treadmill... did I mention he was kinda fat?

whats red with blue spots and is highly inteligent? an apple. i lied to you and am sorry

A mormon walks into a bar. He orders a caffeine free Coke.

Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread.

A man walks into a bar Then another man shoots him in the head because he has anger issues.

Why was the women's basketball player laughed at. The slippery floor caused her to stumble and fall.

What does a gay horse eat? HEEEEEEYYYYYY!

your moms tits are so big she may have breast cancer she may have breast cancer which takes approximitely 300,000 lives per year

If a tree falls in the woods and no one is around to hear it does it make a sound? I don't know... Does the deaf woman locked in my basement?

Three blondes walk into a bar. I prematurely ejaculate.

So a Moose walks into this store, and walks up to the lady bitch, and he goes "Hey, lady bitch, where the potatoes?" So the lady bitch goes "Heheh, their in aisle 5." So the moose goes down aisle 5, and there aint no potatoes.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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