a sailor went to his G.P to see if he had HIV turned out he had hepititis C

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Whats worse than finding a spider in your shower? Getting repeatedly stabbed in the dick by a rapid chipmunk.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

How do you kill half of Mexico? You use nuclear weapons in major cities.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

What did the booger say the other booger? "Is he picking on you again"

thumb_up thumb_down -5

What do you call a fat man that can turn slim REALLY fast? Drew Carey

thumb_up thumb_down -7

What really puts a kick into both my life and the lives of others around me? My leg(s) of which recieves messages from a sophisticated bundle of "wires" in my cranium that enables it to act at all.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

what did tyrone want for Christmas? A dad.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

why was joe in hospital with facial disorder? his mum hit him with a fridge

thumb_up thumb_down -7

69

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Awesome! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> minecraftnow.us <<

thumb_up thumb_down -7

How many chairs does it take to screw a lightbulb? One, if you have enough lube.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Why did the German Constitutional Court issue Decision 2 BvR 1390/12 on September 12, 2012? Because they wanted to refuse the request for a temporary injunction in regards to the European Stability Mechanism!

thumb_up thumb_down -7

why did the giraffe cross the road? because my dad and his "fishing buddies" are having another "meeting" in the basement. I hear weird noises, and I haven't seen my little sister in weeks, since the last "meeting." Dad said she went to a special camp for little girls. I hear horrible noises.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

why didnt the chicken cross the road? It was getting tired of the jokes

thumb_up thumb_down -7

The cat climbed a tree. It didn't want to come down, so it starved to death.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

A doctor walks out of the delivery room and relieves A nervour father, telling him that his new baby girl has just been born with great health. The father sighs in relief as happyness overwhelms him. With such great news, the doctor chuckles and continues on with the rest of what he had to relay to the father. Your wife died during the delivery.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Deadly cancer.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

A chronic hemophiliac walks into a bar. He cuts his leg and bleeds to death.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

YOUIR MAMA IS SO UGLY THAT SHE MIGHT WANT TO LOOK INTO PLASTIC SURGERY TO BETTER HER APPEARENCE

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Oh wow, I've never seen one that big before. Thats what the 12 year old boy said as he starred at the the Great Pyramid of Pharaoh Khufu.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Wanna hear a joke? Joe Jonas.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

How many babies does it take to paint a wall? I don't know it depends on how hard you throw them.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

--Knock Knock Who's there? --Banana Banana who? --Knock Knock You just said that --Sorry i have Alzheimer's

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Mrs. Welsh

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops