Have you seen Stevie Wonder's new girlfriend? Neither has he.

Why did the chicken cross the road? His wife and children had just been struck by a moving vehicle traveling at approximately 45 miles per hour trying to cross the same road. He ran across the road to comfort his dying wife and two children as they took their final breaths. The chicken was also not really a chicken but a middle-aged man who had recently been laid off his job and diagnosed wiuth an incureable disease.

Good luck on your finals everyone!

What's invisble and smells like bananas? My mailbox.

Did you hear about the cow that could fly? Me either

What do you call a fish that isn't moving? Dead.

Why does the Muslim go to Hollywood? Because he is gifted in acting. He believes Hollywood will give him a wider range of career opportunities.

So a man is sitting at a bar with about 20 girls sitting all around him. Amazed at this man's ability to pick up girls, another man asked him how he did. In response, the man said, "What?". The man wasn't able to hear the other man, due to the fact that there were many girls talking.

What did your last slave die of? Terminal Cancer

How come Michael Jackson couldn't get into the petting zoo? It was closed.

how do you get a taco? Buy one!

Why did a Monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead

What did the duck say to the mouse? Quack!

Why was the Black Panther upset? Because racial tensions were high in the 60s.

Anti jokes gives me cold sores

What's the most common pickup line in a gay bar? "Hi, may I buy you a drink?"

And Judas approached the rabbis and Pharisees saying, "The one whom I kiss is the one you seek. " To which they responded, "Gay. "

What is the difference between a blonde and a Mexican? Their hair color.

Women's rights.

Why did the cat eat the cupcake? Cause he was hungry.

What does the young boy say to the gay man Hello Jacob, because he was raised to respect and treat gays equally

A bear and a rabbit both take a dump in the woods below an old oak tree. They look at each other, smile and nod their heads in acknowledgment of one another. The bear is first to let go of his rather large load and a loud THUMP is heard throughout the woods. Shortly after another and then another. The rabbit looks at the bear for a moment then turns closes his eyes and begins to strain. Finally the sound of what can only be described as a machine gun rattles through the wood. Looking impressed the bear looks over at the rabbit as it pops off its last few pellets. When the rabbit is finished the bear asks "Do you have a problem with the shit sticking to your fur?" The rabbit thinks for a moment then looks at the bear and says "Umm... No, not really." So the bear uses the rabbit to wipe his arse.

How do you wake up Lady Gaga? Poke her face!

Yo mama is so depressing. That is so sad.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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