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wanna hear a good anti-joke? no, anti-jokes are a waste of time.

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Once upon a time, I was a Muslim.

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why did summer hit the child because the child is jackson

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How much does a polar bear weight? The average male polar bear weights about 1500 lbs (680 kg)

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How do you fit 100 jews in a car? It wouldn't work.. Nevermind.

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why did the lesbians shop at modell's? because they thought the store had reasonable prices and considerable discounts

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I'm Donald Trump! Wump wump wump! I won the battle but lost the war: I'm Donald Trump!

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What's the difference between a black man and a park bench? A park bench can support a family of four.

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Whats the Twin Towers least favourite movie? Here Comes the Boom.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? His wife and children had just been struck by a moving vehicle traveling at approximately 45 miles per hour trying to cross the same road. He ran across the road to comfort his dying wife and two children as they took their final breaths. The chicken was also not really a chicken but a middle-aged man who had recently been laid off his job and diagnosed wiuth an incureable disease.

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Have you seen Stevie Wonder's new girlfriend? Neither has he.

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Good luck on your finals everyone!

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What's invisble and smells like bananas? My mailbox.

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Did you hear about the cow that could fly? Me either

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What did the man do when he dropped his bar of soap. He picked it up

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What do you call a fish that isn't moving? Dead.

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Why does the Muslim go to Hollywood? Because he is gifted in acting. He believes Hollywood will give him a wider range of career opportunities.

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you: guess what somebody: what? you: you have cancer

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So a man is sitting at a bar with about 20 girls sitting all around him. Amazed at this man's ability to pick up girls, another man asked him how he did. In response, the man said, "What?". The man wasn't able to hear the other man, due to the fact that there were many girls talking.

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A family walks into a talent agency. It's a father, mother, son, daughter and dog. The father says to the talent agent, "We have a really amazing act. You should represent us." The agent says, "Sorry, I don't represent family acts. They're a little too cute." The mother says, "Sir, if you just see our act, we know you would want to represent us." The agent says, "OK. OK. I'll take a look." The father begins by juggling some balls. The mother pulls out her harmonica and begins playing "Dixie". The children and dog try and get the dog to jump through a hoop. For the longest time, the agent just sits in silence. Finally, he manages, "That's a hell of an act. What do you call it?" And the father says, "The Aristocrats!"

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What is different between a pile of dead infants and a red ferrari? Being the victim of a mass murder.

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What did your last slave die of? Terminal Cancer

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How come Michael Jackson couldn't get into the petting zoo? It was closed.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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