What did the blonde say to the chicken? mmm, delicious

thumb_up thumb_down +19

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Realizing on your deathbed that you regret the life you've lived and hate the person you've become.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

What did one tube of glue say to the other tube of glue? Nothing. Inanimate objects, such as a tube of glue, however adhesive the contents of said objects are, are in no way capable of advanced speech, let alone basic communication.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

What did the cancer patient get for Christmas? 2 weeks to live...

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Knock, Knock Come in

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Michael Castillo is gay

thumb_up thumb_down +17

What happened to the Californian who drove off into the sunset. He died. You can't drive in the ocean.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

WHat did Helen Keller get for Christmas? an ipod

thumb_up thumb_down +17

My mother never saw the irony in calling me a son of a B**ch.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Why did Hayden Bryant walk down the street? Because he can, dont doubt Hayden Bryant.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

A Black man and a racist walk into a bar. There was a ruckus.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? -death -kidney failure -gall stones -getting in an automobile accident -getting struck by lightning -getting sodomized -embezzlement -deception -HIV/AIDS -illness of any nature -world hunger -the holocaust -Zimbabwe's economy -getting hit by a train -getting hit by a bus -the hives -getting bit by an alligator -head injuries -being arrested -childhood obesity -sexual predators -highly impoverished areas -losing a finger -getting hit with a bat -corruption -general rudeness -being lost in the woods -contracting a sexually transmitted virus -teen pregnancy -murder -rape -robbery -going blind -losing a child -falling down a well -bestiality -identity fraud -massacres -racism -genocide -mental disabilities in children -bullying -food poisoning -stepping on a nail -eugenics -the mass murder, rape, and theft of the land from the Native people of America -forced assimilation -slavery -brain deteriorating illness -matricide -prostitution - accidentally repeating yourself -prostitution -domestic violence -animal cruelty -pollution -deforestation -global warming -losing your life savings -still birth -oppressive leaders -physical conflicts -world wars and other military conflict -the situation in Rwanda -Inequality in treatment of women in middle eastern countries -auto theft -tax evasion -terrorism -being diagnosed with cancer -clinical depression -prostitution -finding two worms in your apple

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Why can't George Washington drive? Because he died!

thumb_up thumb_down +17

A blind man walks into a pole.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

How many black people does it take to screw in a lightbulb? One, you racist.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

How many licks did it take for the little boy to get to the center of the Tootsie Pop? Three, and then he choked and died.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

What did the kid with cancer gt for Christmas? Nothing. He didn't make it that long

thumb_up thumb_down +17

A baby seal walks into a club.... Oh....

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Roses are red violets are blue most poems rhyme but this one doesnt.,

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Every sixty seconds in Africa... a minute passes - plz like to save Africa!

thumb_up thumb_down +17

What is invisible and smells like carrots? The smell of Carrots. Pretty sure you can't see smells.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

what do you call a blond who likes human flesh a cannibal

thumb_up thumb_down +17

whats worse than dying alone? dying with a boner.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

It wa Jerry's first day of kindergarten He pulled out a .44 magnum and shot himself under the chin where he was instantly dead... Yes, dead

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops