Why cant the white man dunk? Because he lost his legs in a horrible car accident

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Whats the difference between a ham sandwich and a dead baby sandwich? I don't stomp on my ham sadnwiches with cleats before I eat them.

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Yo mama so fat, she was accepted to a clinical trial for treatment of morbid obesity in middle-aged women.

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This guy dies and his wife gets him cremated. She takes the ashes home and lays them out on the table and starts talking to them. "You know that fur coat you promised me? I bought it with the insurance money. You know the new car you promised me? I bought it with the insurance money." Then she whispers, "You know that blowjob I promised you? Well, here it comes..."

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Why was the black man eating a banana? Because bananas are an excellent source of potassium.

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What's the difference between a monkey wrench and a snow cone? A lot.

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- I shot the sheriff! - You murderer

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Why did the cow jump over the moon? He cant jump over the moon due to low gravity

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What did the little boy with cancer say right before he died? Nothing. He was very sick and could not speak at all during his final weeks.

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Why did Billy fall off the swings? Because he had no arms. Knock knock! Who's there? Not Billy.

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What's tastier than a dead baby? An orphaned dead baby.

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What do all of these jokes have in common? They're not funny. You see, the definition of an anti-joke is a "type of indirect humor that involves the joke-teller delivering something which is deliberately not funny, or lacking in intrinsic meaning. The audience is expecting something humorous, and when this does not happen, the irony itself is of comedic value." As this is a page full of anti-jokes, we know to expect the unfunny - thus robbing us of the experience of an anti-joke.

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A sheep walks into a baaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa

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What did the boy with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? Shoes, socks, and mittens.

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Why am I losing my time writing this joke even knowing that I will get lots of thumbs down?

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Paige

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Why did he buy ANTIJOKE THE BOOK! - ? Because he wanted to read it.

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what is small and is not fair Mitt Romneys tax rate

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What's white and sticky? Glue.

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why did the lady take anti depressants? because she was depressed

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what is purple and hairy like a bear? A purple bear

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Where do you find a dog with no legs? Wherever you left it

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What is green and invisible? This cabbage.

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You should really respect vegetables more. They rock. They're all like... AAAHH!!!... and I'm all like... DUDE! THAT'S SO INCREDIBLY RANDOM!... and seriously, you should respect da veggies!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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