How do you fit 100 babies in a bucket? put them in a blender. How do you get them out? potato chips.

Two men and a woman walk into a bar. They are all viciously murdered by a serial killer, who as he walks out, runs into a pole and suffers from a concussion, which he later dies from.

What did the polar bear say to the penguin? Nothing because polar bears lived in the northern hemisphere and penguins lived in the southern. But if one is smuggled from north to south or vice-versa. The polar would growl and consume the penguin.

wat?

It’s dead.

Augustus was touring his Empire and noticed a man in the crowd who bore a striking resemblance to himself. Intrigued, he asked: ‘Was your mother at one time in service at the Palace?’ ‘No, your Highness,’ he replied, ‘but my father was.

How did Helen Keller's parents punish her? They sent her to her room without dinner.

My mumma your mumma live down the street 18,19 marble street out came you and out came me but then your mumma died from her pee

Why does your mom not love you.... Because she is not your real mom.

What did the gay logger do to the tree with a hole in it? Cut it down.

Why did nick and tyler visit anti-joke.com? Because they have nothing better to do.

Knock-Knock. Who's there? The person knocking at your door.

Racial Equality.

ive got a joke for you Nicki minajs ase

Roses are red. Violets are blue. This next line doesn't rhyme. Nor does this one. This isn't a very good poem.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he happened to be walking in that general direction.

This guy dies and his wife gets him cremated. She takes the ashes home and lays them out on the table and starts talking to them. "You know that fur coat you promised me? I bought it with the insurance money. You know the new car you promised me? I bought it with the insurance money." Then she whispers, "You know that blowjob I promised you? Well, here it comes..."

What's faster than a black guy with your TV? Probably someone who doesn't have to carry such a heavy object.

What did 6 say to 7? Nothing, numbers are abstract concepts thought up by humans and therefore, they cannot speak or converse in any sort of language.

what did batman say to robin before getting into the car? get in the car.

Izzy and Zayn Malick got married. Then Zayn asked for a divorce due to their age difference..

banana

what did the duck say to the hawk? quack

Why did the man mow his lawn without his shirt on? Because it was very hot out.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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