Justin Littleton's mom accidentally texting him about buying weed, and then offering to buy him ice cream to make up for it.

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What's the difference between a monkey wrench and a snow cone? A lot.

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What's green and fuzzy and would hurt a lot if it fell out of a tree and hit you? A pool table

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Yo momma's so ugly, she decided to get plastic surgery and now has much higher self-esteem.

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BALL SO HARD... That I got kicked off the team for intentionally fouling other players whenever I got on the court, I'm sorry

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What do you call a chicken with it's head chopped off. A decapitated chicken.

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How do you know that god was a male? You don't, that's why it's called faith.

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What do you call children with no arms or legs ...their names

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*Knock Knock* Who's there? Hello, I'm here to deliver your groceries. Ok thank you, please leave them by the front door.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side. Knock-knock. Who's there? The Chicken.

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Why did the room packed with married people seem empty? Maybe they were all playing hide-and-seek. Or maybe the room was pitch black and they were all standing very still and quietly.

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That was SOOOOO funny that I laughed!!!!!

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Whats the difference between a ham sandwich and a dead baby sandwich? I don't stomp on my ham sadnwiches with cleats before I eat them.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? it was dead Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the dead monkey. Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? Peer-pressure.

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What did the cow get for Christmas? A tree

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Why are you going to thumbs this joke up? Because I use the words "Chuck Norris" Thus making it impossible to not thumbs up.

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Fags are gay.

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Why did nick and tyler visit anti-joke.com? Because they have nothing better to do.

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Hi

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A black man and a white man were both pulled over for street racing. They both were also found to be drunk driving. Only the black man was arrested. It turns out the black man had just massacred an entire Amish village before going street racing to celebrate.

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Q: What's Lindsay Lohan getting for Christmas? A: AIDS

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how Sudan answered England when England's ambassador eaten by Sudanese people? Eat ours

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what do you do when a baby screams? shake it.

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Like CHUCK NORRIS, CHUCK NORRIS like You !

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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