Roses are violets red is blue i like lizards they have fur

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Holy fuckfarts! I did mention I am at my mothers place right? What am I saying? What am I typing? Marry me now!

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when im sad im feel horny i rape little children -jimmy saville , last words of the diary

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Your dad is so bald, that a various number of people compliment him on how well shaven his head is.

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Q:Why did suzie fall off the swing A:She had no arms

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Whats 2+2=? ?= CHICKEN

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What did the man with the knife say to the ostrich? Run or I'll stab you!

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Billy: hey dave, wanna hear a joke? Dave: what? Billy: oh yeah, you are deaf.

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Why did the wife leave her husband? Because they were having sexual differences and time restraints. The husband worked nightshifts as a nurse while the woman stayed home and took care of their child. The husband confessed he never wanted a child in the first place, and that having sexual intercourse with her didn't truly satisfy him.

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What's the difference between a black man and a park bench? Sitting on a black man is just plain rude.

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O.J. Simpson. What would you do in that situation?

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How do you stop a bus? You press the brake pedal, causing the brake pads to squeeze the tires. Which will slow the momentum of the bus to the point of stopping.

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How many penises is one metric butt-load. Oh God I hope you don't know the answer.

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What did little Jimmy say when he saw a group of dancing blue penguins dressed as cannibal clowns with saucers on their head ? "What the f*ck"

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Q: what animal didnt get on Noah's ark in pairs? A: worms. they got on in apples.

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Whats fuzzy and greenand if it falls from a tree it will kill you? A pool table.

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What's the difference in a red sports car and a pile of dead babies? I don't have a red sports car in my garage.

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Why did the woman cry? She was sodomized by wild animals

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Yo momma is so ugly that shes been taking self acceptance classes for her very low self esteem which is only one of many side affects shes had from years of bad relationships and being told she was and infact still is horrifically ugly its a truly sad thing and being the child of her you should be ashamed that you have not worked to help raise her self esteem

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how do you stop a bus? shout FOR ALLAH!

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Wanna here a good joke? Sure, but you spelled hear wrong.

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if u like this i wont pay you a dollar

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Sometimes I fantasize about having sexual relations with Oprah Winfrey. Sometimes I don't.

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Why do Southern guys go to family reunions? To connect with their loved ones, meet any new additions and share old family stories.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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