What did the orphan get on his birthday? Cancer.

whats worse then girls playing sport ? girls cutting grass

What is translucent and smells like a carrot ? A translucent carrot.

How many Jews does it take to fix a light bulb? Four, one to take the light bulb out, one to put a new in, one to hold the ladder, and one to hold the guy holding the ladder

Good question, probably because I cannot get enough focus to "put a spell" on anyone because of my allergy, I use "autocast" for the rest. "Put a spell" I have not heard that since I was 14, that's really oldschool, and kinda geeky, back then it was code talk... Which is also geeky unless it actually serves a good purpose. AAAND... I served my mandatory time in the army as a minesweeper, we got attacked by fucking allies because of a... Yeah, I killed, people on our same team, still bad people, they offed about everybody else until I showed up, long story short, yeah I offed four of them, but that's like ten years ago.. My turn, you really got a crush on me dont you?

What do giant panda bears eat? giant bamboo

How many babies does it take to paint a wall red? Well babies don't have the strength or coordination to hold a paint brush, so you may need to call some painters.

why did the iraqi woman bury her wedding ring in the ground? because it's the only way she could properly pay respect to the death of her husband who recently died in a group suicide bombing.

what do you call a Muslim flying a plane A pilot

Whats your name? Bill. I have a son named Kevin.

Why didn't the poor man buy a candy bar? He wasn't hungry.

Your mom's so fat that she went in to get liposuction and subsequently died from infection.

Why did the kitchen cross the road?

Whats worse than not coming up with an original anti joke? Nothing.

one day 2 strawberrys walked to the ice cream store and ordered a small cup of banana ice cream they were realley happy they were later taken in and tortured and raped

Whats the difference between a pile of dead babies and oranges? With one,you can make a delicous smoothie, but the other is just a pile of citrus fruits.

Knock Knock? Who's There? Not a Jehovah's Witness, let me in!

Kim Kardashian got a job.

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How many people does it take to drive a car? 1 person

Why can't Brent speak at the moment? Because he is eating his ice-cream.

O'Malley, an Irishman; Adam, a Jew; and Patrick, a gay man, walk into a bar. Oh crap. I just outed Patrick.

What would make a black guy sad? His mom dying on death bed...

Is this the krusty krab? NO! THIS IS red lobster, how many i help you?

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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