Roses are Red, Violets are Blue, And I'm color blind, So I don't give a shit

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Did you hear about the guy who got all of his left side cut off?! He died of blood loss and permanent damage to his vital organs.

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what hurts more than a stab wound? two stab wounds

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they call me the green lantern because my little sister died in chemical fire

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why did matt daly shit his pants? he had downs

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knock knock. whos there?(haha ive never made my own joke before) Nick Nick who? Nick Saghir Oh, come in. Would you like some cookies?

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Roses are red Violets are blue In Soviet Russia Poem make YOU!

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A man goes to the beach to meat babes, but know one seemes to notice him. The man notices another man with a crowed of beautiful women surrounding him. Later that day he stops the man and asks him, how do you get all those girls? the man replies put a potato in your bathing suit. so the next day the man puts a potato in his bathing suit, this time he notices girls walking by and laughing, he goes to the man at the end of the day and asks why it did not work, the man replies, next time try putting the potato in the front

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What do you call a white man in the middle of Mexico City? Dave.

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Ok, for Christ’s sake, these sh!tty “animals falling out of a tree” jokes are NOT funny; they were never funny and they’re certainly not getting any funnier with you rehashing them every 5 posts. Fncking stop it.

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Whats black and white, and red all over? A: Your grandma, naturally black haired, beaten to a pulp and left pale white with blood covering the majority of her body.

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What rhymes with Hitler? Walt Disney.

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A dog just died in my neighborhood last week. It made me sad so I vandelized a church and got put into jail. That made me even MORE sad so I vandelized the jail. Morel of the story: This wasn't grammaticly a story. A story is not 3 sentences. --

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Q: What do you call three black people in a car? A: Maltesers

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Why was six afraid of seven? Because 7 was a sixoffender!

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What did the Catholic Priest say to the young boy? God bless you.

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What did Snichols do when he murdered his ex-partner who became a lesbian? The ass dance.

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Whats worse than three dead women in a ditch ? 4 dead women in a ditch.

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Whats better than an anti joke? Having sex with a supermodle

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Yo' mama's such a hoe she got arrested last week for prostitution charges!

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What's worse than getting rejected by your date? Finding out she gave you a social disease. Namely AIDS.

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Why does little susie enjoy her life? Because it was her birthday 364 days ago.

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What is the best way break up with your significant other without hurting their feelings? It is better to get it over with quickly and decisively. Gunshot to the head should do the trick.

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What do you call a cannibal who won't eat his own brother? A pussy.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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