A man dies on the operating table and finds himself in front of the Pearly Gates. St Peter looks at him and says " You are having a hallucination due to all the drugs they have given you and because your brain releases chemicals when you die. I am not real and there is not heaven or a god." Upon resuscitation the man contemplates his hallucination and becomes an Atheist.

What do you call a snail driving a boat? An accident waiting to happen.

How many lightbulbs does it take to screw in a dyslexic men? 25

american government

ass in my face ? no

What's brown and sticky? A stick.

Why didn't the blonde laugh at my blonde joke? She's dead. She should of laughed at my jokes more.

Why did the woman fall off the skateboard? She hit a rock.

A man walked on the street where he saw an other man. The two men said: "Hi!" to each other and walked together down the road. Then one of the men got ran over by a car. The other man said: "ROFL".

whats green and walks? A cabbage, cabbages dont walk

How many mexicans does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Trick question they cant afford one.

What's black and white and read all over? A lot of things.

Why are there no swimming pools in Mexico? The average yearly income is $3,523, and pool chemicals are very expensive.

A man laughs creepily and another man asks him what he's doing he says I have a creepy laugh so the man asks him why he was laughing the man says there's a boy over there that has a frog stapled to his face!!!!!!!!!

In the movie Dark Skies, little white boys were haunted by a mysterious force. The answer is obvious, isn't it? They are being haunted by Michael Jackson's ghost.

Women's rights

What is the difference between a dead baby in a blender and a rock? There are many differences. One of them is the fact that I don't masturbate to a rock.

Why did the man Iorn his face? Because he felt like it.

Loner.

whats worse than forgetting to buy cinnamon toast crunch at the grocery store? Getting beat to death with a gallon of rotten milk...

call 803-389-9808 for a good time ;D

I was looking out the window on a Sunday morning. The coffee was fresh, and the air was moist. I had recieved a phone call last night on the contents of a briefcase that was to be left on my front door today. The explination was vague, and I was told to enjoy my last day. Then I died.

what is the difference between a jew and a pizza? Pizza's don't scream when there in then oven.

Do you want to French kiss? What are you, racist

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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