Why was the boy crying last night? - a clown raped him

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What is the worst part of a 4 blacks hanging from a tree? They were only children

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What are vampires favorite drink? Vampires aren't real.

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A poor woodcutter accidentally dropped his axe into the nearby river when taking a particularly forceful swipe at the tree he was cutting. He felt so dejected he wept. Then, the goddess of the river appeared. "What ails thee, my dear man?" she asked. "My axe -- it fell in the river!" stuttered the weeping woodcutter. "Do not worryI am the goddess of this river, and will find your axe!" said the River Goddess and dived into the river. After waiting eagerly for several minutes, the woodcutter was resigned to the fact that he had imagined the River Goddess.

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If I have 7 oranges in one hand and 8 oranges in the other, what do I have? Big hands!

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Have you seen Elton johns pet dog? Neither he's he.

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Pete and repeat were on a boat. Repeat fell off, who was left?

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If I had 10 cents for every time a hobo asked for change i still wouldn't give him any money

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What did one skeleton say to the other? Nothing... Skeletons don't have vocal cords

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How many light bulbs does it take to screw a blonde? She said she can do 3

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What do you call a fat man in a tiny pipe? Stuck.

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What did James say when he couldn't find his car? "My name's James".

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Why didn't the Irishman want to drink anymore? Because he wasn't thirsty.

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A man walks into a bar and says "I'd like a beer."

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A lady forgot to feed her goat. When she went to feed it, It wasn't there. Why? She didn't have a goat. Another lady forgot to feed her cat. When she went to feed it, it wasn't there. Why? It died 2 days earlier. A man forgot to feed his cow. When he went to go feed it, it wasn't there. Why? They had ate it for dinner last night. A teenage boy forgot to feed his hamster. When he went to feed it, it wasn't there. Why? He spent so much time playing video games that it ate itself. So the boy had his mom make him a sandwich.

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Who lives in a pineapple under the sea? No-one because that's not feasible.

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What time is it? Refrigerator

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s e m e n

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The awkward moment when you have cancer.

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Did you hear about the black guy who went to college? I did too, he worked hard for four years, partied in moderation, but graduated with a degree in chemical engineering and became very successful in the business world in order to support his wife and two children.

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there is a woman named shannen. she is happily married and has children.

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What's the difference between an orange and a dead baby? One is a popular citrus fruit commonly grown in Florida, and the other is a horrible tragedy, possibly caused by miscarriage or a serial killer, who was hopefully immediately jailed for his actions.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it saw food on the other side the the farmer was going to chop his head off.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Well why don't you open the door and find out!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops