What did the American say to the Russian? Hello, but the Russian did not understand

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Why did the man get fired? Because he had cancer

thumb_up thumb_down -6

What's black, white, has green stripes and smells like eggs? I don't know. That's why I'm asking.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

why did the little girl fall off the swing. she had no arms so I pushed her off

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Fitzsimmons. We met at your wife's work party.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

whats black and white and slides on its belly a penguin

thumb_up thumb_down -8

How much wood would a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood? Well that, my friend, is a good question.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

What's small and red that sits in a corner? A baby with a razor blade.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

What's green and has wheels? Grass. I lied about the wheels.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Why could'nt the boy eat peanuts? Because if he did he would proceed to have an allergic reaction, his throat would swell up, he would go into analeptic shock and die.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Why did the women call 911 on her 12 year old son? Because he was schizophrenic and attempting to commit suicide by hanging himself.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

A man named Joe has practiced drawing cartoon characters his entire life. When Joe turns 15 he decides to enter a local drawing competeiton. Joe works very hard drawing his cartoon and finally finishes. When it is the time to hand in his drawing his drawing, he hands it in an receives a satisfying 2nd place and continues on with his life. Two years later Joe decides to enter another drawing competeiton (this one much more competitive) after his drawing skills have tremendously increased. He begins drawing and is 3/4 of the way finished when Joe is brutally murdered by a mentally disturbed man and cannot hand in his art work and is therefore disqualified from the competeiton and loses.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

why did the lady fall on the ground? The cord for the parachute was cut by her husband

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Why did the kid fall over? He was hit by a car

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Yes.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

A blonde sits down in first class on a flight to Miami. That's because she had a ticket for the seat.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

im not as random as you think I- Potato

thumb_up thumb_down -10

What kind of car does Yoda drive? Nothing, Yoda doesn't exist.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

womens rights

thumb_up thumb_down -10

whats the difference between a dog and a cat? ones a dog.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

What's worse than the holocaust? I'm a zebra so what is the holocaust.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

why was 6 afraid of 7?

thumb_up thumb_down -10

What does a Chinese girl get for Christmas? New parents...

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Whats worse than 10 dead babies in 1 trashcan? 10 dead trashcans in 1 baby

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops