What do you call a man with a bad haircut? A man with a bad haircut

My doctor recommended I take anger management classes. That really pisses me off.

Izzy and Zayn Malick got married. Then Zayn asked for a divorce due to their age difference..

A man walks into a 1980's style restaurant he takes a seat and orders his meal.

What would be the consequence of a terrorist detonating a 500 kT nuclear bomb in Manhattan? A ridiculous question. All enriched uranium in Pakistan is safe and out of reach of terrorists, their govt. has assured. Please ask about realistic scenarios next time.

Why does a squid have 8 legs? It doesn't, it has 8 tentacles!

A cruise ship took sail. It was about a mile out into the water already. The blonde had missed the ship when it set sail. She was only capable of swimming a mile. She swam a half a mile out after the ship, and then turned around. She then later died due to a severe case of hypothermia due to the temperatures of the water for long periods of time.

Why did the girl suck the other guy off? to get paid

What do you get when you cross an owl with a bungee cord? My ass

You are so gay you frequently, and consentingly are sodomized by men and frivolously enjoy it.

Roses Are Red Violets Are Blue Bitches Like U Belong In The Zoo

Why did nick and tyler visit anti-joke.com? Because they have nothing better to do.

What do all of these jokes have in common? They're not funny. You see, the definition of an anti-joke is a "type of indirect humor that involves the joke-teller delivering something which is deliberately not funny, or lacking in intrinsic meaning. The audience is expecting something humorous, and when this does not happen, the irony itself is of comedic value." As this is a page full of anti-jokes, we know to expect the unfunny - thus robbing us of the experience of an anti-joke.

What can be worst than letting someone you dont know run a chainsaw? Letting Smokey Dokey run a chainsaw!

Why did the President Truman approve the use a nuke over Hiroshima? Sending Chuck Norris was widely considered to be too cruel.

This guy dies and his wife gets him cremated. She takes the ashes home and lays them out on the table and starts talking to them. "You know that fur coat you promised me? I bought it with the insurance money. You know the new car you promised me? I bought it with the insurance money." Then she whispers, "You know that blowjob I promised you? Well, here it comes..."

What is Justin Bieber + One less lonely girl. A BABY

Why are you going to thumbs this joke up? Because I use the words "Chuck Norris" Thus making it impossible to not thumbs up.

how Sudan answered England when England's ambassador eaten by Sudanese people? Eat ours

Why did the chicken cross the road? What kind of society have we created that a chicken can't even cross a road without his motives being questioned?

What's brown and sticky? A penis.

Why did the man mow his lawn without his shirt on? Because it was very hot out.

Yo mommas so fat they had to change 'one size fits all' to 'one size fits most'

What's white and hides behind a tree? Shy milk.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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