Q: If Hitler spots a jew, what will he do? A: You suck at history dude, Hitler is dead! Moral: What? You did not get the daily news?

thumb_up thumb_down -50

Why are old people such terrible drivers? As we age, our eyesight slowly deteriorates and our reflexes become slower. So, in order to be cautious, the elderly avoid high speed chases and such to maintain their and others safety. Or they could have alzheimers and not realize they are in a moving vehicle at all, it's really a tossup

thumb_up thumb_down -54

Why does jim never go to McDonalds? his wife got shot there.

thumb_up thumb_down -54

what do u call a long dik gay guy Gay Dickerson

thumb_up thumb_down -60

what do you call a black man on crack? a crackhead.

thumb_up thumb_down +63

Obama

thumb_up thumb_down +61

Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 6 witnessed while hiding in a closit 7 rape and kill his mother.

thumb_up thumb_down +59

What is worse than having sex with a dead baby in front of it's mother? Not a lot.

thumb_up thumb_down +55

What's Worse Than Unripened Fruit? Crippling Depression.

thumb_up thumb_down +55

What is green and has weels? A green bycicle.

thumb_up thumb_down +53

What do you call a black kid with dead parents? Depressed

thumb_up thumb_down +53

Q: Why did the girl fall off the swing? R: Because she had no arms.

thumb_up thumb_down +51

Why is Cindy crying? She got a branch stuck in her eye which irritated her sensitive cornea so her tear duct produced a tear to help shed the material from her eye.

thumb_up thumb_down +49

The patient says, "Give me the bad news first!" Doctor replies, "You've got AIDS." "Oh, no! What could be worse than that?" asks the patient. "You've also got Alzheimer's Disease." Looking relieved the patient says, "Oh...Well, that's not so bad. At least I don't have AIDS."

thumb_up thumb_down +49

A fish finds that his fishbowl is on fire. He escapes the bowl only to realize he is equally screwed.

thumb_up thumb_down +49

What was the last thing the clown said to his wife before she died? Rebecca, just stay with me, the ambulance is almost here.

thumb_up thumb_down +47

A girl was walking home from school, she had a pizza box in her hands, her mom was waiting for her in the car to take her to T.G.I.F, and then she dropped the pizza box in the middle of the street. In a frantic attemp to get the box, she run out into the middle of the street and got hit by a semi. Her funeral is tomorrow.

thumb_up thumb_down +47

Roses are red, white, pink, and many other colors. Violets similarly display many color variations due to generations of ardent florists.

thumb_up thumb_down +43

What's purple and gross? Purple gross stuff

thumb_up thumb_down +43

Paul howley can't drive, phahahaha

thumb_up thumb_down +41

Why did the coconut fall out of the tree? Gravity.

thumb_up thumb_down +41

Do you know what is dead on the carpet ? Your mother

thumb_up thumb_down +41

What did the Democrat say to the Republican? "I am sorry about your mother". They had been good friends since childhood and the Republicans mother was soon to die from terminal cancer.

thumb_up thumb_down +39

Whats white and looks like a bunny? a rabbit

thumb_up thumb_down +39

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops