Your mother is so fat........... that she is morbidly obese and is at severe risk for diabetes and other weight related diseases.

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Two fish are swimming and hit a cement wall. One fish says Dam.

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If i could rearrange the alphabet, i'd put my penis in your mouth

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What do you do when you fall of the horse? Consider calling the paramedics because it's possible that when you hit the ground your brain sustained damage and you should be rushed to a hospital immediately.

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Why did the milkman die? Because everyone dies.

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What do you call a hot underaged girl. off limits i am her father.

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two guys walk into a bar. the third guy ducks

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What happened to the cat that fell in the bath? It jumped out feeling cold and embarrassed.

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What do you call a black guy driving a Mercedes through New York? A U.S. Citizen

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how many boys does it take to use 4 computers? 4.

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knock knock Come in!!!

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The nurse at a hospital came out of the delivery room and chucked the baby down the hall to the father. The dad starts crying and the nurse starts laughing and said, "It's ok, it was already dead."

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Doctor, Doctor, I feel like there's two of me! There's not. Your long lost twin died of terminal cancer.

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Communism, Capitalism and an Irish man walk into a bar. Communism says, “I’ll buy the drinks but I require your complete obedient consent.” Capitalism says, “No I’ll buy the drinks but I require that you pay me back with interest” and the Irish man says “No I… I don’t feel very well at all… Oh shite I’ve got the bloody runs!” He then proceeds to shit myself.

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Q: Why did Sally not like her trip to Hawaii? A: A volcano erupted and killed her whole family.

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Roses are red Violets are blue The sky is blue too

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why did the monkey fall out the tree? he lost his grip

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Where does Osama bin Laden do his shopping? He doesn't, he's dead.

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Q:how many anti jokes does it take to make a person lough A:1

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girl: why do you love me? boy: i don't.

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A viking walks into a bar, and orders 6 beers. the man working asks "why did you order so many beers?" the viking says"because one for me 6 brothers who were separated from me many years ago." then he leaves. the next morning the viking walks into the bar, and orders 5 beers.the man working says"im sorry for your loss." the viking says"what? oo no im just getting tierd of drinking!'

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Yo mama's so poor, she can no longer handle the down payments on her home and is in great need of financial aid

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Why do sea guls fly over the sea? In order to get from place to place, flying is much faster than walking. Sea guls live on a diet of salt-water fish, and the ocean is where their main food supply subsides.

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Why did the Asian woman drive 20mph on the highway? There was a deadly car accident with many fatalities.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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