Why did the african man wear no clothes? Because he liked being naked.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Your friend is so retarded I am getting a bit worried and his mother should take him to get tested for mental retardation.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

A man brings his entire family in to meet a show producer. The producer says, "Okay, let's see what you got." The man then proceeds to lead his family through a variety of acts, including showcasing the proper way to drink English tea and how to dress for a polo match. When they finish, the producer asks, "And just what do you call your act?" To which the man replies, "The Aristocrats!"

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Why was the kindergarten teacher crying? a child had just choked to death

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Why did the cat fall out of the tree? Cause the branch broke. Why did the baby fall out of the tree? Cause it was stapled to the cat.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

John - hey do you have tickets to see Oasis? Sam - No I bought green day tickets intead John then proceeds to violently masturbate. Sam at first feels uncomfortable, then shits all over John and joins in.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

What do you get when you cross sodium citrate, citric acid, benzyl alcohol, monoethanolamine, sodium benzoate, gylcol disterate, FD&C Yellow #5, ammonium lauryl sulfate, methylisothiazolinone, fragrances/perfumes, FD&C Blue #1, sodium chloride, zinc pyrithione, methylchloroisothiazolinone, ammonium xylenesulfonate, ammonium laureth sulfate, cetyl alcohol, cocamide, guar hydropropyltrimonium chloride, 1-Decene, homopolymer, hydrogenated, trimethylolpropane tricaprylate and water? Head & Shoulders Dandruff Shampoo for Fine-Oily Hair

thumb_up thumb_down -4

If life gives you lemons ask where they came from.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

James: They say attitudes are contagious. Bill: How do you know? James: My whole family caught it and they will all die within 2 weeks.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

This is a haiku I said this is a haiku You read a haiku

thumb_up thumb_down -4

why did sally fall off the swing? because she had no arms. knock knock? who's there? not sally.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

What do 9 out of 10 people enjoy? gang rape

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it noticed that there may be foodstuffs on other side.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

An Englishman, and Irishman, and a Scottsman walk into a bar and the bartender says, "Is this some kind of a joke?"

thumb_up thumb_down -4

What did the 5 cent store clerk say to the customer? That will be 5 cents.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

A priest and a prostitute are sitting next to each other on a bus. The priest asks her what she does, and she says "I sell my body to strange men." The priest then explains to her about Christianity, and she gives up her ways and becomes a devout Christian.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Q: Why don't Jewish cannibals like Germans A: Because it gives them gas

thumb_up thumb_down -4

religion.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Why did the guy with alzheimer's say to his wife? He can't remember.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Whats fleash color flesh color and fleash color? a hodo rolling down a hill.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

have you tasted chocolate flavoured slurpee? no. i haven't either

thumb_up thumb_down -6

who touched the priests sticky hand? Jake Duncan

thumb_up thumb_down -6

What did the table say to the human? Nothing, tables don't talk.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

What did one homo say to the other? Well, the politically correct term is homosexual, and he didn't say anything because they've never met.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops