Who is so stupid they could literally be classified as mentally retarded? Evan Lovro

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Why did little Timmy start crying? Because he was shot.

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Knock Knock. Who's there? The police. You're under arrest. The police you're under arrest who? Sir, if you don't open up the door we're going to have to open it ourselves. We have a warrant for your arrest. Sir if you don't open up the door we're going to have to open it ourselves we have a warrant for your arrest who? Sir we are authorized to use deadly force. If you don't comply we will shoot to kill. Sir we are authorized to use deadly force if you don't comply we will shoot to kill wh-

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Everyone knows a sandwich made with bacon, lettuce, and tomato is a BLT, but what do you call a sandwich made with tomato, bacon, and lettuce? A BLT.

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How many WOMEN does it take to change a light bulb? YOU ALREADY KNOW ITS GONNA BE MORE THAN ONE!

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Why did the man have a bad day? Well first of all, his wife left him, then his two kids both committed suicide, then a large falcon pecked at him genital area. After that he proceeded to be hit by a car, and soon after he was hit by a bus. Following this, his corpse was raped by a transvestite pig, and then finally his spirit got hit by a plane on its way up to heaven, knocking it to Hell.

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How do you get four gay guys on a bar stool? With teamwork and coordination, each could place one foot on the seat, and they can all stand up using each other for balance and support. The fact that they are gay in unimportant.

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Two Blondes walk into a bar. They each enjoy a refreshing drink before heading home to greet their family

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What's red and smells like paint? Red paint.

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How do you confuse an idiot? By confusing an idiot.

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Women's sports.

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Roses are red Violets are blue your mum went to the loo and out came you

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Knock Knock It's the police, im afraid your wife has been killed in a horrible car accident.

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What happened to the cat that fell in the bath? It jumped out feeling cold and embarrassed.

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Did you hear about the cannibal who had a wife and ate kids?

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Why did Suzie fall off the swing? Because she has no arms. Knock knock! Who's there? Not Suzie

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why did the baby cross the road? because it was stapled to the chicken -written by sion dafydd jones, uk

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Knock knock Who's there? Joke Joke who? Auntie Joke Great, could you bake me those cookies I like.

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Knock knock. Who's there? The police, your family is dead.

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What did the watermelon say to the apple? Nothing. Watermelons are fruits and incapable of speech.

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What did the midget get for Christmas? A new watch and a gift card for Applebee's.

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im a dragon, no im not

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Yesterday, I was hosting a party, and there were a lot of people crowding around some fruit punch I made all trying to get a glass... Whoops, it appears I forgot the Punch line.

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Hello? Hi. Who is this? Yo mom. Your not my mom. Im the Irish man that did your mom.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops