How did the family of Cubans get to Florida? They flew first class from their home in upstate New York.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Roses are green I'm bipolar

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What's black and white and red all over? Colors

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42

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Why was six afraid of seven? Seven looked angry and had a gun.

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Nobody knows why she swallowed the fly, she probably won't die.

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How do you call a black man selling fruits ? Yes, but I'm not sure

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Q: Why did the boy fall off his bike? A: Someone threw a refridgerator at his head.

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Did you hear about the plane that crashed and killed 1000 people? My sister has cancer.

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How much wood could a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood? As much as he wants to.

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https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FbuluDBHpfQ

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Why wasn't the man hungry? Because he just ate a thousand almonds.

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A man decides to go hunting in the woods with a shotgun, he is going through the woods and a bear randomly pops out of no where, knocks him down and rapes him. So the next day he came back with an even bigger shotgun and said, "i am going to kill this bear" so he goes through the woods, the bear comes out of nowhere, knocks him down and rapes him again. So he comes back the next day with and even bigger shotgun and says, " i am going to kill this bear, skin it, and eat it" so hes going through the woods and out comes the bear, knocks him down, gets real close to his face and says, "you dont come out here for the hunting do ya".

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A man walks into a doctors office. The doctor says "I've got good news and bad news. Which do you want first?" The man responds "Let's hear the good news." The doctor says "I ran a series of tests and found you have leukemia, but your insurance paid for everything." Shocked, the man asks "What's the bad news?" The doctor answers "Your company is switching to a private insurer and because of your pre-existing condition you've been denied coverage. None of your future treatments will be covered."

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what has 4 legs but can't walk? a paralyzed dog

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What do you get when you cross an orangatang with a grizzly bear? Nothing, they just walk past each other unless the bear eats the shit out of the monkey then feeds it to her cubs

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What did the homeless man get for Christmas? Nothing

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When life gives you lemons, find someone with a papercut.

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knock knock come in

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mark is mark

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Why did the bones cross the road? They didn't, the dogs ate them.

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Why was the blonde crying? She had just been raped by a 10-foot praying mantis.

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What's the difference between a fine wine and a dead baby in a blender? One gets better as it ages, and the other is a horrific accident.

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WHATS FASTER THAN INTERNET BUSTA RYMES

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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